Archive for the ‘ femi-nazi ’ Category

Some stupid person wants to kick their straight A daughter out of the house when she turns 18 while she is still in high school.

What a piece of _______ .

Listen up Shawn you foolish idiot.  That tiny little man that is running your life is going to drop you like a turd when his kids don’t need a nanny anymore.  Then who will you have?  You are burning this bridge.

Source: 2012 California Codes :: FAM – Family Code :: DIVISION 9 – SUPPORT [3500 – 5616] :: PART 2 – CHILD SUPPORT :: CHAPTER 1 – Duty of Parent to Support Child :: ARTICLE 1 – Support of Minor Child :: Section 3901

She also said many people contact her to purchase positive pregnancy tests, some even traveling from as far as Orlando, but she added that she makes it a point to never ask what the buyers do with the positive pregnancy tests.WJAX-TV’s “law and safety expert” Dale Carson disagreed. “Fraud is the first thing that comes to my mind,” he stated. “This is the kind of thing that makes legislators go ‘we need to pass a law that says you can’t do this.’”

Source: Florida woman earns middle class salary selling positive pregnancy tests on Craigslist – TheBlaze

leading scientist Dr Noel Sharkey, a former advisor to the UN, called on governments to prevent robotics being hijacked by the sex industry

Source: Sex will be just for special occasions in the future as robots will satisfy everyday needs

No, your pubic hair cannot prevent STDs.

Source: Myths about pubic hair you must stop believing t1216 | Photo Galleries of Weight Loss, Diet Plan, Healthy Recipes, Sexual Health | TheHealthSite.com

The mis information begins with a study that has no causation links to anything just much innuendo and misdirection from facts.

Source: Not to shave? In life (and TV), pubic hair is staying on

Astronomy.com is for anyone who wants to learn more about astronomy events, cosmology, planets, galaxies, asteroids, astrophotography, the Big Bang, black holes, comets, constellations, eclipses, exoplanets, nebulae, meteors, quasars, observing, telescopes, NASA, Hubble, space missions, stargazing, and more

The universe seems a little less lonely today.

Astronomers from the University of Nottingham conducted a new survey of the universe’s galaxy population and concluded that previous estimates lowballed the census by a factor of about 20. Using data from Hubble and telescopes around the world, as well as a new mathematical model, they estimate that there are two trillion galaxies in the observable universe; previous estimates put the number of galaxies in the universe at around 100 billion.

Looking Through Time and Space

To understand how the researchers accomplished their task, we first need to understand what they mean by the “observable universe.” Because the speed of light is fixed, we can never get a true picture of what the universe looks like right now. As we look further and further away, we must necessarily look further back in time as well.

So, in discovering how many galaxies exist in the observable universe, the Nottingham researchers haven’t discovered how many galaxies exist right now, they’ve found out how many galaxies we would be able to see if our instruments were good enough. This may seem like a big caveat, but it’s the only way can observe the far-flung universe. Being able to look back in time has its advantages, however.

To reach their conclusion, the researchers looked at the rate of galaxy mergers throughout the universe. Most galaxies likely started small, and grew through a series of mergers with other galaxies as time went on. Because the researchers could see clusters further and further back in time as they looked deeper, they could compare the concentration of galaxies long ago to more recent times — relatively speaking.

They found that galaxies appear to clump together as time goes by, forming larger structures while also reducing the total number of galaxies present. By running this rate backward, and extrapolating beyond what we can currently see, the researchers concluded that around 90 percent of the galaxies out there are too faint and too far away to view with current telescopes. This is what allowed them to drastically increase our estimation of the number of observable galaxies.

The researchers released their paper Tuesday on the preprint server arXiv, it is set to be published in the Astrophysical Journal.

Why Can’t We See Them?

This new galaxy census gives us an answer to a decades-old question known as Olbers’ paradox. If there are so many stars and galaxies out there, why can’t we see them all? Given the nearly unimaginable number of stars and galaxies out there, the night sky should be awash in light.

The solution, say the researchers, lies in the huge distances that separate us from most galaxies. Because the universe is expanding, the light that reaches us is subject to a phenomenon called “redshift.” Similar to the Doppler effect that alters the pitch of a passing ambulance, as distant celestial objects move away from us, the wavelengths of light they emit appear to stretch out. Go far enough, and the light will redshift below the level discernible by the human eye, and eventually telescopes. In addition, galaxies and interstellar space between them is filled with tiny particles of dust that absorb and filter out light.

Some of this radiation shows up as background light, a faint diffuse glow of light that appears to have no source. The rest, however, disappears before it ever reaches us.
The James Webb Telescope, set to launch in 2018, may be able to pick out some of these elusive stars. Until then, we’ll just have to believe

Source: Astronomy.com

February 13, 2013

Shocking Alien Fears Force Pope From Office

By: Sorcha Faal, and as reported to her Western Subscribers

 

A stunning Ministry of Foreign Affairs (MFA) report prepared for President Putin, which is circulating in the Kremlin today, states that Pope Benedict XVI was forced to resign this past week over Catholic Church fears that this 85-year-old leader of over 1 billion Christians was “mentally and physically unprepared” to deal with the coming revelation about the truth of alien beings.

In our 22 January report, Russia Orders Obama: Tell World About Aliens, Or We Will, we detailed how the issue of extraterrestrial beings was brought to the forefront of the World Economic Forum (WEF) with the naming in their 2013 Executive Summary of the danger posed to our world over the discovery of alien life with their stating: “Proof of life elsewhere in the universe could have profound psychological implications for human belief systems.”

Also noted in our previous report were Prime Minister Medvedev’s 7 December 2012 off-air comments to reporters which were recorded and wherein he stated: “Along with the briefcase with nuclear codes, the president of the country is given a special ‘top secret’ folder. This folder in its entirety contains information about aliens who visited our planet… Along with this, you are given a report of the absolutely secret special service that exercises control over aliens on the territory of our country… More detailed information on this topic you can get from a well-known movie called Men In Black… I will not tell you how many of them are among us because it may cause panic.”

Spurring Pope Benedict XVI to become the first leader of the Catholic Church to resign in nearly 600 years, this MFA report says, was the appearance over Los Cristianos, Spain on 21 August 2011 of the long prophesized “bird of prey” interplanetary spacecraft, and which was followed nearly 3 weeks ago with a fleet of them appearing in the skies over Mexico City.

To fully understand the significance of these “bird of prey” UFO’s, this report continues, files relating to the 27 September 1989 Voronezh Incident must be studied in length, especially as it relates to the “messages” delivered to eyewitnesses from the “giants”.

In an 11 October 1989 New York Times article about the Voronezh Incident titled U.F.O. Landing Is Fact, Not Fantasy, the Russians Insist it says:

“It is not a joke, nor a hoax, nor a sign of mental instability, nor an attempt to drum up local tourism by drawing the curious, the Soviet press agency Tass insisted today in discussions of what it called an extraterrestrial visit to southern Russia.

Residents of the city of Voronezh insisted today that lanky, three-eyed extraterrestrial creatures had indeed landed in a local park and gone for a stroll and that a seemingly fantastic report about the event carried Monday by the official press agency Tass was absolutely true.

The three-eyed creature, about nine feet tall and fashionably dressed in silvery overalls and bronze boots and with a disk on its chest, disappeared, then landed and came out for a promenade with a companion and a robot.

The aliens seemed to communicate with each other, producing the mysterious appearance of a shining triangle, and activated the robot with a touch.”

Regarding these “messages” from the Voronezh “giants”, this MFA report says, was the warning to human beings that when these “bird of prey” UFO’s descend upon Earth the whole planet will be in peril.

The Voronezh “giants” further related, this report says, that the alien beings associated with these “bird of prey” UFO’s were the cause of the 14 April 1561 massive “sky battle” over Nuremberg, Germany which was depicted in a famous 16th century woodcut by Hans Glaser [photo 3rd left] and described by the residents as: “A very frightful spectacle.” “The sky appeared to fill with cylindrical objects from which red, black, orange and blue white disks and globes emerged. Crosses and tubes resembling cannon barrels also appeared whereupon the objects promptly began to fight one another.”

Important to note is that the Catholic Christian faith headed by Pope Benedict XVI, as well as nearly every other religion on Earth, all prophesize in their teachings a time when the “gods” will return to our planet and engage in a battle that could very well bring our entire planet to the brink of destruction.

Equally important to note about Pope Benedict XVI’s shock resignation is how it eerily compares with Saint Malachy, who as an Irish saint and Archbishop of Armagh, in the 12th Century, received a vision of 112 Popes later attributed to the apocalyptic list of Prophecy of the Popes. He was the first Irish saint to be canonized by Pope Clement III in 1199.

American authors Tom Horn and Cris Putnam in their 2012 book “Petrus Romanus: The Final Pope is Here” about Saint Malachy’s prophecies told interviewers last Spring that Pope Benedict XVI would resign by late 2012, or early 2013, and described the next Pope to follow as “Petrus Romanus,” or “Peter the Roman,” writing: “In the final persecution of the Holy Roman Church there will reign Peter the Roman, who will feed his flock among many tribulations; after which the seven-hilled city will be destroyed and the dreadful Judge will judge the people.”

Though the masses of people reading of the things this report contains will, undoubtedly, ridicule them, the same cannot be said of the elite moneyed classes who, even at this writing, are protecting themselves from “something” at such a fever-pitched pace it is destabilizing the entire global economy, and as exampled by the highly respected Zero Hedge news service in their article titled “What Do They Know That We Don’t?” and which, in part, says:

“Friday evening when no one was supposed to pay attention, Google announced that Executive Chairman Eric Schmidt would sell 3.2 million of his Google shares in 2013, 42% of the 7.6 million shares he owned at the end of last year—after having already sold 1.8 million shares in 2012. But why would he sell 5 million shares, about 53% of his holdings, with Google stock trading near its all-time high?

“Part of his long-term strategy for individual asset diversification and liquidity,” Google mollified us, according to the Wall Street Journal. Soothing words. Nothing but “a routine diversification of assets.”

Routine? He didn’t sell any in 2008 as the market was crashing. He didn’t sell at the bottom in early 2009. And he didn’t sell during the rest of 2009 as Google shares were soaring, nor in 2010, as they continued to soar. In 2011, he eased out of about 300,000 shares, a mere rounding error in his holdings. But in 2012, he opened the valves, and in 2013, he’d open the floodgates. So it’s not “routine.”

Mr. Schmidt isn’t alone. Corporate insiders were “aggressively selling their shares,” reported Mark Hulbert. And they were doing so “at an alarming pace.” The buy sell-to-buy ratio had risen to 9.2-to-1; insiders had sold over 9 times as many shares as they’d bought. They’d been aggressive sellers for weeks.

Instantly, soothing voices were heard: “don’t be alarmed,” they said. But Mr. Schmidt and his colleagues at the top of corporate America, multi-billionaires many of them, are immensely well connected, not only to each other but also to the Fed, whose twelve regional Federal Reserve Banks they own and control.”

To why Google Chairman Schmidt did not attend this years World Economic Forum, where the danger of aliens was being discussed, opting instead for a visit to North Korea (who announced yesterday that they had exploded another nuclear weapon) and when coupled with the information contained in this MFA report, is far from being “soothing”, and is, instead, something well all should be very alarmed about as the end is much nearer than the beginning as those with “eyes to see” and “ears to hear” already know.

February 13, 2012 © EU and US all rights reserved. Permission to use this report in its entirety is granted under the condition it is linked back to its original source at WhatDoesItMean.Com. Freebase content licensed under CC-BY and GFDL.

[Ed. Note: Western governments and their intelligence services actively campaign against the information found in these reports so as not to alarm their citizens about the many catastrophic Earth changes and events to come, a stance that the Sisters of Sorcha Faal strongly disagrees with in believing that it is every human beings right to know the truth. Due to our missions conflicts with that of those governments, the responses of their ‘agents’ against us has been a longstanding misinformation/misdirection campaign designed to discredit and which is addressed in the report “Who Is Sorcha Faal?”.]

You May Already Be To Late…But It Has Begun!

They Are Going To Come For You…Why Are You Helping Them?

Source: Shocking Alien Fears Force Pope From Office

According to Daniel Sheehan, the Catholic Church is now actively preparing for the discovery of Alien contact with highly a advanced alien species. Speaking at contact in the desert, he told of a what will be a historic papal encyclical decree calling for nothing less than the disassembly of the power structures that are destroying our civilisation and preventing us from joining an enlightened galactic community.Pope Francis previously caused quite a stir last year when he announced that he would baptise Aliens, quite a statement and a timely one at that given the fact the Vatican owns the biggest telescope on the planet.Former Minsitry Of Defence Nick Pope Told Neon Nettle: “It’s no secret that the Catholic Church has been repositioning themselves on this issue over the past few years. Do they know something? I doubt it. I think they’re just trying to ensure that if the scientific community announces the discovery of extraterrestrial life, the church is prepared.”Sheehan’s talk began with a summary of his previous work as an advocate for alien disclosure which, he says, also included classified sections from Project Bluebook (a study into UFO’s by the American airforce). He went on to say that his access to Bluebook gave him exposure to photographic evidence of crashes UFO’s that had Alien symbols on them.daniel p sheehan a harvard college trained american government foreign policy scholar talks about alien disclosure through the vatican © pressDaniel P. Sheehan, a Harvard College trained American Government & Foreign Policy Scholar talks about alien disclosure through the vaticanhttp://www.neonnettle.com/news/1447-pope-francis-to-announce-church-prep…

Source: Pope Francis To Announce Church Preparing For Alien Contact This Week (their-we are already here billions of years – CNN iReport

Vatican Approves UFOs

Vatican officials affirm the existence of UFOs and calls the aliens brothers, interviews with Msgr. Corrado Balducci and Fr. Gabriel Funes, News reveal secret talks with the UN on aliens and UFOS and agreement of possibility of the existence of extraterrestial life

Vatican Approves UFOs

‘The Aliens Are Our Brothers’

Dear Atila,

Salve Maria!

I believe you and TIA readers will be interested to know that the Vatican now is supporting the UFOs, according to the news reports below. I made a little research on the Internet and found these documents, whose value you may judge for yourself.

I gave the links to the sources so that you or anyone else can check the original documents. I also added links to the two principal Youtube interviews on the topic: one by Msgr. Corrado Balducci, a Vatican consultant on these matters; another by Fr. Gabriel Funes, the Chief Vatican Astronomer, whose Observatory is in the papal palace of Castelgandolfo.

Receive my best regards,

In Jesu et Maria,

Manoel Ricardo Fiuza, Brazil

______________________

News report from 2000

Monsignor Balducci is a Vatican theologian and an insider close to the Pope. He has been featured on national Italian television numerous times stating that extraterrestrial contact is a real phenomenon and “not due to some psychological impairment.”

In this testimony he explains that not only the general populace but also highly credible, cultured and educated people of high status are increasingly acknowledging that this is a real phenomenon. He goes on to speak about the extraterrestrial people as part of God’s Creation and affirm that they are neither angels nor devils. However, he affirms, they are probably more spiritually evolved.

Source here

______________________

News reports from April 7, 2012

The Vatican tries to get a step ahead on Extraterrestrial issues before announcements by major world governments

The Vatican is playing a leading role preparing the world for disclosure about extraterrestrials.

There are few things that are sure bets in this life and one of them is that the Vatican would never have stepped out to tell the world that they believe extraterrestrials are real without emphatic proof or advance knowledge that some type of disclosure is imminent.

The Vatican is not a cutting edge group; it generally moves so slow that it is painful to much of the world’s congregation. After all, this is the same organization that to this day does not allow women to be priests or any form of contraception. This is the same organization that forced Galileo to recant his findings and put him under house arrest for the remainder of his life for telling the world that the earth is not at the center of the universe.

Msgr. Corrado Balducci 

Msgr. Corrado Balducci

For the most part, the Vatican is stodgy, archaic, slow to move on major issues and generally behind the times. So what prompted them to move at lightening speed on the difficult issue of extraterrestrials life and full disclosure?

Well, they have been receiving information from their embassies that is hard to deny and they have attended a series of secret meetings in NYC at the UN that changed everything. Shortly after that, the Vatican gave the “Aliens Are My Brothers Interview,” which should have made worldwide headlines, but it was typically played down by the mainstream media.

The Vatican’s new openness on extraterrestrial life is consistent with reports of secret discussions held at the United Nations that began in February 2008 and are still ongoing today. The Vatican’s permanent representative to the UN, Archbishop Celestino Migliore, was reported to have attended these meetings along with a number of other prominent government officials to discuss increasing UFO sightings and the implications of extraterrestrial visitations.

Significantly, Migliore’s position requires that he maintain close relations with the Vatican’s Pontifical Academy of Sciences. At the time of the secret UN discussions, Migliore made a presentation on moral issues associated with scientific problems such as climate change. Most importantly, the UN discussions reportedly led to a new policy of openness on UFOs that is being adopted by approximately 30 nations beginning in 2009 and culminating with a full disclosure of information to the world. This is extremely significant as there are approximately 22 nations that have begun full or partial disclosure!

For a full list of countries that have partially disclosed significant UFO or alien information, click here.

The meetings that the Vatican took part in with the UN in New York City were also attended by a host of US government agencies that downplayed the announcement. We can only speculate about the agencies involved and the content discussed. You can be sure it was blockbuster news because, shorty afterwards, both the UN and the Vatican came out with their startling announcements.

Source here

______________________
Vatican Official Declares on National Television:
Extraterrestrial Contacts Are Real

Some things simply cannot be debunked as much as people would like, no matter how hard the debunkers try. Sometimes the truth just keeps rising to the surface, and this is one of those times.

Monsignor Corrado Balducci, a theologian member of the Vatican Curia, the governing body, and highly placed Vatican official who is close to the Pope, has been on Italian Television no less than five times stating that extraterrestrial contact is a real phenomena.

Balducci provided an analysis of extraterrestrials that he feels is consistent with the Catholic Church’s understanding of theology. Monsignor Balducci emphasized that extraterrestrial encounters “are not demonic. They are not due to some psychological impairment. They are not a case of entity attachment, but rather these encounters deserve to be studied carefully.” Since Monsignor Balducci is a demonology expert and consultant to the Vatican and since the Catholic Church has historically demonized many new phenomena that were poorly understood, his statement that the Church does not censure these encounters is all the more remarkable.

The bottom line is that the Vatican has moved lightening fast on the extremely difficult issue of extraterrestrials and religion; they have attended secret meetings at the UN on exactly this subject. They have also met in secret with a host of US officials, and, after evaluating all the information, they made their astounding announcement.

It really makes no difference if you believe that the Vatican and UN announcement is a prelude to a false flag event or that it is real. One thing is for certain, some type of disclosure (probably partial or limited) is imminent and coming soon. It will be up to each person to decide on the authenticity of the actual announcement. The question becomes: Are we paying attention or are we asleep at the switch? We are all in for a Galileo Moment and those only come along every 200 to 300 years. Are you ready?

Source here

______________________
Vatican States: ‘Aliens Are Our Brothers,’
Interview with Religious Leaders on Aliens

In an interview entitled “Aliens Are My Brother” granted to L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican newspaper, Father Gabriel Funes, director of the Vatican Observatory, stated: “In my opinion this possibility (of life on other planets) exists.” He also stated that “intelligent beings, created by God may exist in outer space” and “some aliens could even be free from original sin,” concluding that “there could be (other beings) who remained in full friendship with their creator”.

Fr. Gabriel Funes, Vatican Astronomer

Speaking about the search for Earth-like worlds about to be embarked upon with the Kepler Space telescope, Jesuit Brother Guy Consolmagno, another astronomer working at the Vatican Observatory, told the BBC, “We Jesuits are actively involved in the search for Earth-like planets.”

He continued, “The idea that there could be other intelligent creatures made by God in a relationship with God is not contrary to traditional Judeo-Christian thought. The Bible has many references to, or descriptions of, non-human intelligent beings; after all, that’s what angels are. Our cousins on other planets may even have their own salvation story – including other examples of the incarnation of the second person of the Trinity. We are open to whatever the Universe has for us.”

Source here

_________________

Source: Vatican Approves UFOs

Psychologists say being unable to find a job can change your personality

When you’re out of work, you may become less friendly, less hard-working, and less open to new experiences.

Source: How unemployment can change your personality – Business Insider

A prominent local media executive fired from Yahoo last year has filed a lawsuit alleging the firm’s CEO Marissa Mayer led a campaign to purge male employees and replace them with women.

Misandry at work by the man haters again!

A prominent local media executive fired from Yahoo last year has filed a lawsuit accusing CEO Marissa Mayer of leading a campaign to purge male employees.

“Mayer encouraged and fostered the use of (an employee performance-rating system) to accommodate management’s subjective biases and personal opinions, to the detriment of Yahoo’s male employees,” said the suit by Scott Ard filed this week in federal district court in San Jose.

Ard, who worked for Yahoo for 3 ½ years until January 2015, is now editor-in-chief of the Silicon Valley Business Journal. His lawsuit also claims that Yahoo illegally fired large numbers of workers ousted under a performance-rating system imposed by Mayer. That allegation was not tied to gender.

Yahoo spokeswoman Carolyn Clark said Yahoo couldn’t comment on pending litigation, but she defended the company’s performance-review process, which she said was guided by “fairness.”

“Our performance-review process was developed to allow employees at all levels of the company to receive meaningful, regular and actionable feedback from others,” Clark said. “We believe this process allows our team to develop and do their best work. Our performance-review process also allows for high performers to engage in increasingly larger opportunities at our company, as well as for low performers to be transitioned out.”

In addition to Mayer, two other female executives — Kathy Savitt, former chief marketing officer, and Megan Liberman, editor-in-chief of Yahoo News, identified in the lawsuit as Yahoo’s vice president of news at the time — are accused in the lawsuit of discriminating on the basis of gender.

“When Savitt began at Yahoo the top managers reporting to her … including the chief editors of the verticals and magazines, were less than 20 percent female. Within a year and a half those top managers were more than 80 percent female,”

the lawsuit said. “Savitt has publicly expressed support for increasing the number of women in media and has intentionally hired and promoted women because of their gender, while terminating, demoting or laying off male employees because of their gender.

“Of the approximately 16 senior-level editorial employees hired or promoted by Savitt … in approximately an 18-month period, 14 of them, or 87 percent, were female,” the lawsuit said.

Ard, who was hired at Yahoo in 2011, stated in the suit that until Savitt and Liberman took over management of the firm’s media section in early 2014, he had received performance reviews and stock options reflecting “fully satisfactory” work. But in June 2014, Liberman told him that his role as head of editorial programming for Yahoo’s home page was being given to a woman Liberman had recently hired, the suit said.

Then in January 2015, during a performance review phone call, Liberman told Ard he was fired, effective that day, because “his performance was not satisfactory.”

“Liberman stated that she was terminating (Ard) because she had not received a requested breakdown of (his) duties. (Ard) had already provided that very information as requested, however, and reminded Liberman that he had done so,” the lawsuit said. “Liberman’s excuse for terminating (Ard) was a pretext.”

Right after the call, Ard requested a copy of his performance review and said he wanted to appeal his firing, the suit said. “Both requests were denied and (Ard) was ordered to turn in his laptop and depart the premises immediately.”

Ard’s suit also takes aim at the performance-review process he said Mayer imposed. The process allowed high-level managers to arbitrarily change scores of employees they had no contact with, and it “permitted and encouraged discrimination based on gender or any other personal bias held by management.”

Liberman, he said, once “unilaterally lowered” the scores of three men whose performance Ard had evaluated, while she maintained the scores of two women.

Yahoo’s use of this review system to fire many workers individually in a short time period broke the U.S. and California Worker Adjustment and Retraining Notification (WARN) acts, which mandate advance notification of mass layoffs, the suit alleged. “Marissa Mayer became CEO on a wave of optimism and then engaged in a sleight of hand to terminate large numbers of employees without announcing a single layoff,” the suit said.

Yahoo’s diversity reports indicate that the percentage of women in leadership positions at the company rose slightly to 24 percent in 2015 from 23 percent in 2014.

Source: Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer led illegal purge of male employees, lawsuit charges

After three months, more than a third of study participants grew back more than half of their lost hair

Source: Arthritis drug Xeljanz may help with the hair loss condition alopecia – CBS News

Just what is SEX?

The internet got hot and bothered earlier this week following media reports of research that revealed millennials, the so-called “hook up” generation, aren’t having all that much sex after all.

“Millennials are having less sex than any generation in 60 years. Here’s why it matters,” the Los Angeles Times blared, among others.

The only problem: That’s not how the study authors, who published their work in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior, intended for their research to be interpreted.

“Just like it’s not true that millennials are all promiscuous people who are on Tinder all the time, it’s also not true that all millennials are sexless and just watching porn in their moms’ basements,” lead author Jean Twenge, a psychology professor at San Diego State University, told The New York Times.

So what do we know about millennials’ sexual habits? Here’s the lay of the land, according to the latest research:

1. Millennials ARE having sex.

Leren Lu via Getty Images

While it’s true that there’s a slightly higher number of millennials who aren’t having sex than there were in older generations, the vast majority of millennials (a full 85 percent) are sexually active, which for the purposes of the study means they’ve had sex in the last 12 months.

As for those who aren’t having sex, delayed adulthood ― the idea that major life events like marriage and parenthood are now occurring later in life ― could have something to do with it.

“For late millennials and iGen [the generation after millennials, roughly those born after 1996], sex is now joining the later to adulthood party. Sex has caught up to other adult milestones and is being delayed,” Twenge told Science of Us.

2. But teen pregnancy plummeted under millennials’ watch.

Keith Brofsky via Getty Images

Let’s give millennials a well-deserved pat on the back, shall we? Teen pregnancy has plummeted to a historic low over the last 30 years, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Experts aren’t sure exactly who or what we have to thank for lower teen pregnancy rates. But according to a 2014 Brookings report, there’s evidence that reality shows featuring teenaged pregnant millennials, such as MTV’s “Teen Mom,” may have contributed to a third of the decline in teen births between 2009, when the shows began airing, and 2010.

3. They aren’t ready for marriage.

Uwe Krejci via Getty Images

A 2015 Pew study defined millennials as between 18 and 33 that year. Seven in 10 of them had never married, and those who did marry were waiting longer. In 1960, the average age of first marriage was 23 for men and 20 for women; in 2011, according to Pew, it was 27 for women and 29 for men.

And in 2013, only 26 percent of millennials got married between the ages of 18 and 32, compared to 36 percent of Gen Xers 1997 or 48 percent of baby boomers in 1980, Pew reported.

While the changing roles of women, access to reliable birth control and a greater acceptance of premarital sex and cohabitation can’t be discounted, economics also plays a role in young people’s decision to delay marriage.

“When there’s rough economic times, marriage rates go down,” sociologist Eric Klinenberg, who co-authored Aziz Ansari’s book Modern Romance: An Investigation, told the Washington Post. “People don’t feel comfortable committing to someone during hardships.”

4. But they do enjoy a good hookup.

Kentaroo Tryman via Getty Images

“With more Americans spending more of their young adulthood unmarried, they have more opportunities to engage in sex with more partners and less reason to disapprove of nonmarital sex,” Twenge and her colleagues wrote in a previous study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior in May 2015. Both Twenge’s studies relied on data from the General Social Survey, a project that has been collecting data on American behavior for decades.

And indeed, 45 percent of millennials in the 2015 study reported they’d had casual sex with someone who wasn’t their boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse in their late teens or 20s, compared to 35 percent of Gen X at that age. (Data wasn’t available for baby boomers.)

5. And when they do tie the knot, it sticks.

Kathrin Ziegler via Getty Images

While millennials’ marriage delays might not please grandma, marrying later in life does come with benefits ― including including a greater likelihood of staying together.

Couples who marry in their early 20s have a higher risk for divorce than those who wait a few years, although that rate starts to creep up again for couples in their mid 30s. Happy unions even come with an added bonus: the so-called “marriage advantage,” which includes health benefits like a decreased risk of cancer and heart attack, all worth waiting for.

urce: Here’s Everything We Know For Sure About Millennials And Sex

Sexting is supposed to be a wonderful thing that spices up your relationship and keeps things fresh. It’s also, for the most part, meant to be private (for your partner’s eyes only), especially if photos are involved. A new study, however, suggests that our sexts are probably being shared around

Sexting is supposed to be a wonderful thing that spices up your relationship and keeps things fresh. It’s also, for the most part, meant to be private (for your partner’s eyes only), especially if photos are involved. A new study, however, suggests that our sexts are probably being shared around more often than we’d like.

According to research conducted by the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and published in the journal Sexual Health, one in four people share sexts they receive with their friends. After surveying 5,805 single adults between the ages of 21 and 75, researchers found that although 73% of participants said they were uncomfortable with their sexts being shared, 23% reported having shared sexy photos and texts with an average of over three different friends.

“That finding suggests that the real risk of sexting is the potential for nonconsensual sharing of sext messages,” Justin Garcia, the study’s author, a research scientist at the Kinsey Institute, said in a press release. “It raises the question that if someone sends something to you with the presumption that it’s private, and then you share it with others — which, when it comes to sexting, nearly one out of every four single Americans are doing, what do we want to consider that type of violation? Is it just bad taste? Is it criminal?”

These, of course, are all valid questions, and well worth asking, considering that 60% to 74% of respondents reported believing that sexting could damage their reputation, career, self-esteem, or current relationships or friendships. Interestingly, the study also found that men were twice as likely as women to share sexy texts with others, and women were more likely to be upset about their sexts being shared.

As Garcia says, it’s not really the sexting itself that presents an issue: It’s the risk of a violation of privacy.

“The real risk is not the sending of sexual messages and images per se, but rather the nonconsensual distribution of those materials to other parties,” he said. “As sexting becomes more common and normative, we’re seeing a contemporary struggle as men and women attempt to reconcile digital eroticism with real-world consequences.”

The bottom line is, as fun and exciting as sexting may be, keep in mind that your sexy messages might not always be for your partner’s eyes only.

Source: 1 in 4 People Share Sexts, Indiana University Study

The bikini is turning 70 and is still turning heads. The iconic two-piece bathing suit was the creation of French engineer Louis Reard.

Source: Bikini Atoll Revolutionized the Swimsuit 70 Years Ago – NBC News

Author Jennifer Weiner is encouraging women to put on a swimsuit, snap a selfie and then go have fun this summer.

Source: Jennifer Weiner’s #WearTheSwimsuit movement inspires women – TODAY.com

“I have a routine: I brush my teeth, shave my vagina,”

Pubic hair grooming is on the rise, especially for women who are younger, white and went to college, a new study finds.

The researchers surveyed more than 3,300 women ages 18 to 64 about their grooming practices, such as shaving, waxing or trimming. This is the first time that a nationally representative sample of women has been surveyed about this subject, although there have been numerous smaller studies done in parts of the country, according to the study, published today (June 29) in the journal JAMA Dermatology.

And most earlier studies about pubic hair grooming failed to include women of the broad age range examined in the new study, said Dr. Tami Rowen, an OB/GYN at the University of California, San Francisco Medical Center and the lead author of the study. But the new study’s inclusion of middle age women makes it clear that pubic hair grooming is more popular among younger women, Rowen said.  [7 Facts Women (And Men) Should Know About the Vagina]

Compared with women in the 18-to-24 age group, women in the 25-to-34 group were 83 percent less likely to groom, the study found. And women ages 55 to 64 were 96 percent less likely to groom compared with 18- to 24-year-old women.

In addition, the researchers found, grooming was the most common among white women. Women of all other races were less than half as likely to groom compared with white women, according to the study.

The researchers also found that women who had gone to college were 3.4 times more likely to groom than those who did not have a high school degree. Income also played a role: Women who made more than $100,000 a year were 22 percent more likely to groom than those who made less than $50,000 a year.

Shaving was the most common method that women used to groom, with 61 percent of the women reporting using razors and 12 percent using electric razors. Other common methods included trimming, with 17.5 percent of women saying they use scissors, and waxing, with 4.6 percent of women saying they used that method, according to the study.

Why groom?

The survey also included a number of questions about why women practice pubic hair grooming.

One common assumption about why women groom their public hair is that it makes certain sex acts better, Rowen told Live Science. However, the researchers found no link between the types of sex acts women were participating in and their grooming preferences, she said.

Rather, “partner preference played a big role,” she said. Indeed, women were 96 percent more likely to groom if they said their partner preferred it, according to the study.

The researchers also found that 40 percent of the women reported going to the doctor as a reason for grooming. Anecdotally, Rowen said that she has seen many women in her practice in recent years who are apologetic about their appearance if they have not groomed.

Groomers considered themselves to be hairier than those nongroomers. They were also more likely to agree with the statement “most women groom their pubic hair” than were nongroomers, the researchers found.

Women who regularly groomed were more likely to say that they looked sexier and that their vaginas “looked better” when their pubic hair was groomed, compared with nongroomers, according to the study.

This particular was not surprising, Rowen said. It’s in line with the current cultural trend of what people consider to be the definition of sexy, she said. [51 Facts About Sex]

Nearly 60 percent of the women reported that they groomed for hygiene purposes. Removing pubic hair, however, does not make things cleaner “down there.”

“Hair has a purpose,” Rowen said. In the case of pubic hair, it’s there to protect important, delicate tissues, she said. Some women, for example, have very sensitive labia, and removing the hair can leave the labia susceptible to injury, she said.

“There’s nothing cleaner about” groomed pubic hair, she added.

And grooming can even result in injury, Rowen said. She personally has seen many injuries as a practicing gynecologist, she added. Common injuries include cuts, abscesses, burns from hot wax and inflamed hair follicles, she said.

And in the case of women with sensitive labia, removing the hair from the area can lead to thickened, irritated skin, she said.

Rowen noted that she didn’t have a strong medical opinion as to whether women should groom. But if women are experiencing problems due to grooming, she said, she would talk to them about alternatives.

In addition, she cautioned against making any permanent changes to one’s physical appearance. People are spending thousands of dollars on laser hair removal because of a trend, she said.

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The STUDY

Source: Get out of hair! Most American women like to go bare down there – NY Daily News

According to Peter Lawford and others (not just Kitty Kelley), Nancy worked her way through Hollywood by giving the best blow job in town, and was rumored to have sucked off Frank Sinatra in the Oval Office. It said that Nancy had invited Sinatra to the White House for lengthy luncheons and instructed staff not to disturb them.

Her moralizing was bad enough, but it was compounded by the hypocrisy of the woman. They say that when Nancy was in her prime, during her starlet days, she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch.

Ronald Reagan’s attitude towards gays was, “Fuck ’em, they’re faggots.” I was there. I remember. Like Bush, Reagan had no time or money for “faggots,” so he refused to fund research into AIDS. And unqualified Nancy (with her “psychic”) was running the White House, while Ronnie zoned out on drugs for pre-Alzheimer’s.

A famous Hollywood Mogul introduced Ronald Reagan to Nancy when he needed someone to give Ron a blow job to settle his nervousness before shooting a movie scene. Beauty wasn’t required

Bill Clinton is the first president caught in a scandal apparently because of a predilection for oral sex (although an earlier president was brought down by a Deep Throat). Clinton is probably not, however, the first president who enjoyed it.

According to Kitty Kelley’s biography, Nancy Reagan “was renowned in Hollywood for performing oral sex.” Just-say-yes Nancy–in the days when she was Nancy Davis–was known to give the best blowjob in town, “not only in the evening but in offices. [T]hat was one of the reasons that she was very popular on the MGM lot.” It must have made her very popular with Ronnie as well.

Nor would Clinton be the first national politician tempted to invoke the hair-splitting distinction that oral sex does not constitute adultery (legally speaking, this is correct). When Virginia senator Chuck Robb was caught in various compromising positions with a number of women, he issued a statement saying that he hadn’t “done anything that I regard as unfaithful to my wife,” even though he’d engaged in oral sex.

If you believe Newt Gingrich’s former mistress Anne Manning, the Speaker has for decades relied on the blowjob as the sex act with built-in plausible deniability. Referring to her first date in 1977 with Gingrich, Manning told Vanity Fair in 1995: “We had oral sex. He prefers that modus operandi because then he can say, ‘I never slept with her.”‘

And for those who wonder how a scandal-plagued Clinton didn’t think twice about a few quickies in the White House, consider the case of two-time Washington, D.C., mayor Marion Barry Jr. Here is a politician who was filmed smoking crack, ousted from office, and forced to serve a six-month sentence for cocaine possession at the federal prison in Petersburg, Virginia.

Yet on December 29, 1991, Barry still had enough hubris to receive a blowjob from an unidentified female visitor, in the middle of a visiting room, surrounded by other prisoners, their visitors, and a prison guard. Although Barry later claimed that The Washington Post concocted this story, he was quickly transferred to a medium-security facility in Altoona to complete his sentence.

So what is it with these oral fixations? It’s fair to say that politicians are not the only American men who fetishize fellatio. It occupies a peculiar but vital place in the popular imagination: part taboo, part mystical ecstasy. Those who perfect their technique are considered to have a power lock on men, despite–or because of?–the act’s association with homosexuality. As the authors of Sex Tips for Straight Women From a Gay Man put it, “If you can make the most of your mouth motion, you can have just about anything, whether it’s straight A’s in grad school or the Hope diamond.”

Fellatio has been imagined–and probably practiced–almost as far back as Adam’s first stiffie. According to G. Legman’s sweeping history Ora-Genitalism, ancient Greek and Peruvian vases, and at least one ancient Egyptian papyrus, depict various positions of fellatio. The 4th century A.D. Indian Kama Sutra features an entire chapter on “oral congress,” noting that it is primarily practiced by homosexuals, masseurs, and “unchaste and immoral women, quite free from any inhibitions.”

The American history of fellatio is less documented. It does not appear to have been a widespread technique practiced by American opposite-sex partners until the 1920s. (It remains illegal in more than a dozen states and the District of Columbia.) In the early part of the century, oral sex was considered something of a specialty, an act that wives and proper girlfriends were presumed to know little about and not want to do.

That has changed: pop culture today is filled with female fellatial braggadocio–Liz Phair promises on Exile in Guyville to be an unnamed man’s “blowjob queen,” a possible role model for Monica Lewinsky, who allegedly joked about being appointed “special assistant to the president for blowjobs.”

As demonstrated by the semi-intentional confusion over whether fellatio constitutes adultery, however, the emergence of oral sex as an above-board sexual activity is fraught with uncertainty, even contradictions. For one thing, most Americans appear to practice oral sex far less frequently than other sexual activities. Three-quarters of men and women report lifetime experience of oral sex, according to The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States. But “the proportion for whom oral sex is a current activity (as measured by its occurrence in the last sexual event)” is dramatically lower, around 25 per cent. Thus, conclude the authors, oral sex “has in no sense become a defining feature of sex between women and men (as vaginal intercourse or, perhaps, kissing is).”

Oral sex becomes more common as one climbs the education ladder. Only 41 per cent of women with less than a high school education report having performed fellatio on a partner, and 49 per cent have received cunnilingus; by contrast, about 80 per cent of women with at least some college education have experienced one or the other. (The difference between less-and more-educated men is lower, but still striking.)

There are also significant differences among races; a far higher number of whites practice oral sex than blacks or other races (the reluctance of some black men to perform cunnilingus is a staple of both stand-up comedy and hardcore rap).

As with almost any sexual act imaginable, there are strong elements of power and domination caught up with fellatio. Think of the stereotypical setup: the donor is on his or her knees, invoking a position of worship. Madonna picked up on this ambiguity–“Down on my knees/I want to take you there”–in “Like A Prayer.”

Perhaps it is this detachment from intimacy, the presumed one-sidedness of the blowjob, that makes fellatio the power-tripper’s sex act of choice. Certainly there is a pervasive sense that oral sex isn’t quite sex. In a broad-based survey of teenage virgins by the RAND institute issued in November 1996, nine per cent reported engaging in fellatio with ejaculation, and 10 per cent in cunnilingus. (That is approximately one-third the percentage who report engaging in masturbatory activity with a partner.)

One Maryland child psychiatrist has said: “I’ve heard from teenagers, but not adults, stuff like, ‘I only [performed oral sex on] him,’ like that really wasn’t having sex.”

Legal analysts have focused on whether or not Clinton could be nailed for lying about having sex with Lewinsky. It has been widely suggested that if, in his mind, Clinton believed that oral sex did not constitute adultery or “an improper relationship,” then he did not legally perjure himself.

At that point, however, the important question is less about attitudes concerning oral sex, and more about rationalization. Dr. Anna Salter, a Madison, Wisconsin–based psychologist, specializes in identifying the evasions given by sex offenders. “These people have a lot of cognitive distortions,” Salter says. “You have to be very careful with language, because they will say ‘I never did anything to hurt her,’ even though they abused someone. I am not saying that Clinton is a sex offender. But I don’t think the principles [of evasion] change at all between the two behaviors.”

Research: Harold Schechter, Kaelen Wilson-Goldie

Miles Davis turned to Nancy Reagan and said…

In 1987, he was invited to a White House dinner by Ronald Reagan. Few of the guests appeared to know who he was. During dinner, Nancy Reagan turned to him and asked what he’d done with his life to merit an invitation. Straight-faced, Davis replied: “Well, I’ve changed the course of music five or six times. What have you done except fuck the president?”

Source: The Weather Up Here:: Nancy Reagan: Queen of the Hollywood Blow Job!

In fiction, sexbots are generally depicted as supplicant women eager to serve male creators—but what would these machines be like if we flipped that script?

“Once you’ve had a lover robot, you’ll never want a real man again.” That’s a line from Gigolo Joe, the sexbot played by Jude Law in A.I. Artificial Intelligence, the 2001 Steven Spielberg film. What makes Gigolo Joe special—aside from his dewy skin, gnocchi-plump lips, and shiny-suit razzmatazz—is that he represents a very rare filmic depiction of a male sexbot .

Think about it. The sexbots you know and love are almost exclusively female bots servicing human men. They’re the Stepford Wives’ gynoids and Austin Powers’ s fembots; they’re Ava and Kyoko of Ex Machina and Pris of Blade Runner. Chick sexbots populate television, too. Buffy the Vampire Slayer‘s April and the Buffybot were lovingly crafted with the express purpose of fucking. Humans’ bellicose Niska is a sexbot, as, arguably, is Battlestar Gallactica’s Six. Dark Matter’s Wendy is an “entertainment android,” whose abilities include sex. While Star Trek: The Next Generation’s Data is “fully functional,” his functionality is more a feature than his purpose—being able to have sex does not a sexbot make. Intentionality is key.

These media representations have set up both our expectations of what sexbots should look like (undeniably hot, recognizably human, and typically female) as well as what our reactions should be (an erotic frisson of fear and curiosity). Think of Pris’s manipulative shy-girl act in Blade Runner, Kyoko’s placid, mute unbuttoning of her blouse in Ex Machina, or the bright red dress of Six and her wet, hot, world-destroying kiss. Movies and television depict sexbots as women who are simultaneously objectified and untrustworthy; sexbots personify a metaphor for a walking, talking, seducing monster. Given this model, it’s especially important that the sexbots you see are female and their consumers are male.

Fictional sexbots matter because every month drags sexbots closer to becoming a reality. Last September , Kathleen Richardson, a robot ethicist at England’s Montfort University, launched her Campaign Against Sex Robots with Erik Billing of Sweden’s University of Skövde. Steeped in anti–sex worker rhetoric, the campaign’s manifesto states, “We take issue with those arguments that propose that sex robots could help reduce sexual exploitation and violence towards prostituted persons, pointing to all the evidence that shows how technology and the sex trade coexist and reinforce each other creating more demand for human bodies.” It’s a dystopian vision.

The Campaign Against Sex Robots is a prophylactic organization, since no sexbots really exist. A company called TrueCompanion claims to make “the world’s first and highest quality sex robot doll,” but their female model, a $7,000 machine dubbed Roxxxy, is essentially a stationary rubber-clad computer equipped with touch sensors and a vibrating vagina. But Richardson is right that there are a lot of would-be sexbot creators who see her sci-fi nightmare as a shiny future full of possibilities.

One of these people is Matt McMullen, creator of the RealDoll, who is currently developing an animatronic sex doll with artificial intelligence. “The hope is to create something that will actually arouse someone on an emotional and intellectual level,” McMullen avers in a slickNew York Times video segment that’s lit with an Instagram-like romantic haze. The video profiles McMullen’s quest to make “the world’s first sex ro-obot,” as Denise, the computer animation, says with a telling diphthong. His company’s RealDolls are touted as the Rolls Royce of sex dolls, but even a Rolls Royce Wraith looks pretty antiquated to people who lust after a MacLaren P1. Hence the need to create something that walks and talks—or at least writhes and whispers—like a living human woman.

Though McMullen and Richardson are diametrically opposed, they assume three very crucial points about sexbots, and none of them are necessarily true. First, that the primary consumers of sexbots will be heterosexual men. Second, that these consumers need their sexbots to look recognizably human. And third, that consumers require an emotional attachment to their bot.

So here’s my radical thought: What if we throw those assumptions aside? Fuck men and their need for bots that fall into the uncanny valley. What if we choose, instead, to market sexbots to women? How does that one simple change rewrite the entire sexbot script?

Watch: Behind the scenes at a VR porn shoot

It wouldn’t take tech as advanced as Gigolo Joe to pique women’s interest in sexbots. For one thing, women already use sex toys. While some, albeit limited, studies suggest sex toy purchasers are split roughly evenly between women and men, there’s no denying that the sex toys made for women are more common, better functioning, and more interesting. Moreover, women don’t really care whether the toy they’re using to orgasm even faintly resembles the anatomy of a human man. The closest cousin to a Hitachi magic wand is a handheld blender, but no one cares that this iconic vibrator looks nothing like a dick. While toys for men, whether Fleshlights or RealDolls, conjure the appearance of an actual woman, women’s toys don’t. They can look like woodland creatures, alien genitals, lipstick cases, or militarized hassocks. Women can—and will—get off on just about anything as long as it works for them.

Women’s flexibility even extends from toys into porn. Women’s porn viewing habits, which range from Kim Kardashian to gang-bangs to gay male porn, tend to be more varied than those of men. All of these points together suggest that there’s a strong argument to be made that we women—way more than men—are polymorphously perverse, being sexually aroused by far more configurations of bodies than men. It’s a fluidity of sexuality that matches the limitless anatomical potential of a male sexbot.

Let’s take as given that women already buy and use sex toys and that, whether because of nature or nurture, we have more flexible sexualities. Now let’s add the facts that women’s male partners die earlier, that women are critiqued more harshly for casual sex, that women can get pregnant, that women experience higher rates of rape and domestic assault, and that lots of women have a hard time having an orgasm from penis-in-vagina sex. Hold all this in our heads, and we get a glimpse of why women would be the consumers of sexbots.

Now let’s imagine what a male sexbot could do. For one thing, it wouldn’t have to look like or sound like Denise, the “world’s first sex ro-obot.” We can begin by tossing out McMullen’s male versions of RealDolls—a scruffy metrosexual reading How to Make Love Like a Porn Star, a bro in gym shorts and tube socks casually leafing through a magazine, and a mohawked drummer lounging in leather—all three show a tragic lack of imagination.

A drawing of a sexbot done by one forward-thinking individual interviewed by Joel Golby

Given that women are inured to sex toys that resemble a sonic screwdriver designed by a Teletubby, a sexbot for women could be vaguely torso-shaped, equipped with vibrating pads and oscillating nubs, and furnished with outlets that would allow for multiple snap-on tools. You could refashion the bot to play to your pleasure de jour—a single guy for a day; a safe, sane, consensual gang-bang for a night. Maybe make it’s voice-activated so that you could rotate between modes without the tiresome pressing of a button. Give it rechargeable batteries, cover it in silicone skin (blue is nice, or maybe a cheery fuchsia), and it’s easy to clean and ready to go whenever you are.

No fuss. No muss. No singularity. And no uncanny valley. Perhaps most important of all, this vaguely man-shaped sexbot would be to a Hitachi as a chick’s Roomba is to her vacuum cleaner: an improvement on an existing technology, and one that’s entirely possible to create today. Orchid colored and vaguely man-shaped, this bot could also sidestep the major controversy of sexbots: that of emotional connection. Richardson sees emotional attachment as an ethical problem, calling it the human-sexbot connection an “asymmetrical relationship,” while McMullen is counting on it to help sell his toys. Our bot avoids all this drama.

The fact is that we don’t yet know what kind of relationship humans will have with their robots, sexual devices or not. Robot ethicist Dr. Kate Darling, a research specialist at the MIT Media Lab and a fellow at the Harvard Berkman Center, who studies the way robots affect human empathy, told me that human feelings for robots will be “a different type of thing… I don’t think that it’s ever going to rival human relationships, because we’re so complex and we’re so far away from building that type of AI.”

There isn’t a lot of research yet that documents what humans feel for robots, but Darling suggested that humans may come to think of sexbots in the same ways that we feel for cats. “Cats may not give a shit about you,” she said, “but you can love them anyway and care for them. You get something out of that.” In short, we humans will always anthropomorphize our tech and imbue it positively or negatively. Ultimately, however, the ways we see our tech say more about us than the tech itself.

“A sex robot seems like an enhancement of sex toys,” Darling said, adding, “maybe sexbots for women wouldn’t even look like men, although I think the intimacy aspect would lead them to be designed like male bodies.” (Although perhaps not. A while back, VICE UK’s Joel Golby invited a bunch of people to draw their visions of an ideal sexbot and his respondents came up with an array of models.) The design is limited only by our tech, our imaginations, and consumer drive—and there’s consumer evidence to suggest that women could be induced to buy a better, bigger, smarter, and more expensive sex toy.

However logical the idea of a sexbot designed and made for women, it’s the representations of Ex Machina, Blade Runner, and Humans that prevail, at least for now. I’ve looked around, and if companies are designing sexbots for women, they’re playing it very close to the vest. Still, I suspect that the ideal consumers of sexbots will be women, and both robot ethicists and sexbot designers should take us into account. Still, these designers can let film be their guide. “We are the guiltless pleasures of the lonely human being,” says Gigolo Joe. “We work under you, we work on you, and we work for you. Man made us better at what we do than was ever humanly possible.”

Sit back, and imagine the possibilities.

Source: What Would Sex Robots for Women Look Like? | VICE | United States

When my first baby was born, the doctor handed her to me and said, “Meet your future teenage daughter.” Then she got on the phone with her own teenage daughter, and the two of them got into a loud argument about what to eat for dinner. I still remember the daughter’s aggrieved voice, audible through her mother’s flip phone: “That is REVOLTING and I would rather eat DOG FOOD.”My husband and I raised our eyebrows at each other over our own daughter’s downy head. Surely this sweet, elfin, cashew-shaped bundle would never pick a fight with us about veal scallopini. We’d be there for her and hear her; if she became a vegetarian, we would develop a taste for seitan. When this baby reached adolescence, our groovy brand of friend-parenthood and open lines of communication would upend the traditional I-hate-you-don’t-leave-me dynamic.(Are you laughing? I am.)Fourteen years later, here’s what I’d tell my new mom self about my current teenage daughter — who, despite occasional tiffs, really is well worth the wait.Elisabeth EganElisabeth Egan is books editor at Glamour and the author of a new novel, “A Window Opens.” (Beowulf Sheehan)1. You never know who will come downstairs in the morning. One morning, she’ll be all smiles and cheer — she loves your new sweater. The next day, she’ll be mute and scowling. She’ll gesture with her chin at the sweater you’re now wearing for the second day in a row because she said she liked it, and this time she’ll say, “Are you really wearing that?”2. Most of the time, she doesn’t want a hug. But when she does, she’ll wrap her arms around your waist and rest her head on your shoulder, and the effect is reminiscent of happening upon a warm spot in a freezing cold lake. You don’t know why it’s there — maybe you don’t want to know — but you float there for a while, enjoying the view. Fifty percent of the time, as she’s extracting herself from your arms, she’ll say, “Can I have money to buy Julia a birthday present?”3. You know you need to keep your opinions to yourself. The problem is, sometimes she wants your opinion: on clothes, on a sticky situation with a friend, on whom she should write about for her project for Women’s History Month. You will share a rewarding dialogue, but the next day, when you say, “Did you learn anything interesting about Susan B. Anthony?” she’ll look at you as if she has no idea what you’re talking about. In fact, she’ll look at you as if she has no idea who you are. #coldspot4. After a decade of making late-night small talk with baby sitters, nothing beats having your own teenager meet you and your spouse at the front door in her pajamas. She says her little sister was scared, “so I put her to bed in my room.” She wants to know if the two of you had fun, if you liked the movie, what you had for dessert. #warmspot5. You think she’s wasting her money on cheap black booties from Forever21.com. When they arrive in the mail, you’re pleasantly surprised that they look chic and stylish on her. When she goes to bed, you try them on. Guess what? You look like a 41-year-old mom wearing cheap shoes.6. Her school has a mock trial, model UN, dance team, chorus and science Olympiad. You ask if she has considered signing up for any of these activities. No way, she says, nobody does these things. What about the chorus? You heard they take a year-end trip to Dorney Park & Wildwater Kingdom. She rolls her eyes: “Trust me, Mom, nobody joins the chorus.” You wonder who was on those buses outside the school last spring.Raising kids who like each other for lifeRaising kids who like each other for life7. For years, she couldn’t wait to ride in the front seat. Now that she’s finally eligible, she’ll opt for the third row of the minivan instead. You tell her you weren’t born yesterday; she needs to put away her phone while you’re driving. You are not her personal chauffeur.8. She’ll encourage you to join Instagram, and she’ll remind you to like her pictures. If you write, “I love this face” beneath one, the comment will quickly vanish. She wants your vote, not your adoration.9. She spends a lot of time on her bed, texting, and she isn’t interested in volunteering at a soup kitchen or learning how to knit. Your mom helpfully points out that she is an excellent student: “When you were her age, you were failing math and Spanish and you lost four wallets in three months.” This is strangely reassuring.10. Her friends are adorable, chatty, charming, funny, polite, responsible and kind. Their mothers promise they aren’t like this at home. The mothers who tell you that they’re best friends with their 14-year-old daughters are not your people. Just be happy to have friends your own age, especially a few who have known you since you were her age.11. She knows she can tell you anything (doesn’t she?), but you’ve noticed she saves big revelations for when your friends come over. When you ask her why, she says you’re nicer when your friends are around. Who isn’t?12. Her texts are full of heart emo

Source: Raising a daughter? Handle with care — especially when she’s 14 – Chicago Tribune

Whenever I first heard the word “microaggression,” sometime in the last five years, I’m sure I was unaware how big “micro” could get. The accusation of a microaggression was about to become a pervasive feature of the Internet, and particularly social media. An offense most of us didn’t even know existed, suddenly we were all afraid of being accused of.We used to call this “rudeness,” “slights” or “ignorant remarks.” Mostly, people ignored them. The elevation of microaggressions into a social phenomenon with a specific name and increasingly public redress marks a dramatic social change, and two sociologists, Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning, have a fascinating paper exploring what this shift looks like, and what it means. (Jonathan Haidt has provided a very useful CliffsNotes version.)Western society, they argue, has shifted from an honor culture — in which slights are taken very seriously, and avenged by the one slighted — to a dignity culture, in which personal revenge is discouraged, and justice is outsourced to third parties, primarily the law. The law being a cumbersome beast, people in dignity cultures are encouraged to ignore slights, or negotiate them privately by talking with the offender, rather than seeking some more punitive sanction.Microagressions mark a transition to a third sort of culture: a victim culture, in which people are once again encouraged to take notice of slights. This sounds a lot like honor culture, doesn’t it? Yes, with two important differences. The first is that while victimhood is shameful in an honor culture — and indeed, the purpose of taking vengeance is frequently to avoid this shame — victim status is actively sought in the new culture, because victimhood is a prerequisite for getting redress. The second is that victim culture encourages people to seek help from third parties, either authorities or the public, rather than seeking satisfaction themselves.The debate over microaggressions often seems to focus on whether they are real. This is silly. Of course they’ve always been real; only the label is new. Microaggressions from the majority to the minority are as real as Sunday, and the effect of their accumulated weight is to make you feel always slightly a stranger in a strange land. The phenomenon is dispiriting, even more so because the offenders frequently don’t realize that their words were somewhere between awkward and offensive (once again).On the other hand, in a diverse group, the other thing you have to say about microaggressions is that they are unavoidable. And that a culture that tries to avoid them is setting up to tear itself apart.I’m using microaggressions broadly here: to define the small slights by which any majority group subtly establishes its difference from its minority members. That means that I am including groups that may not come to mind for victim status, like conservatives in very liberal institutions. And no doubt many of my readers are preparing to deliver a note or a comment saying I shouldn’t dare to compare historically marginalized groups with politically powerful ones.I dare because it highlights the basic problem with extensively litigating microaggressions, which is that it is a highly unstable way of mediating social disputes. Deciding who is eligible to complain about microaggressions is itself an act by which the majority imposes its will, and it is felt as alienating by the minorities who are effectively told that they don’t have the same right to ask for decent treatment as other groups. As a conservative social scientist once told me, “When I think of my own laments about being an ideological minority, most of it is basically microaggression.”The stream of petty slights, laughable misunderstandings and smug assumptions are not just a perpetual irritant. They are also experienced by members of the targeted group as a message: “You don’t quite belong here, and therefore, you are under constant, if low-level risk, that the majority will not protect you if something goes wrong, or perhaps, will take steps to expel the outsider.” And they’re experienced this way whether you are eligible for victim status or not, which is why I get a surprising number of notes from conservative academics, expressing some rather milquetoast opinion and then closing with: “Please don’t publish this, because I don’t have tenure yet.” I have never gotten such a note from a liberal academic, nor do liberal columnists of my acquaintance report getting similar notes from, say, liberal history professors expressing their support for abortion rights.If you establish a positive right to be free from alienating comments, it’s hard to restrict that right only to people who have been victimized in certain ways, or to certain degrees. It’s easy to say everyone has a right not to be alienated. It’s also easy to say “you should only seek social or administrative sanction for remarks that are widely known and understood to be offensive slurs.” It is very, very

Source: How Grown-Ups Deal With ‘Microaggressions’ – Bloomberg View

There was a moment at a recent rally when the nature of the tuition beast was suddenly, and unforgettably, revealed; when “Mandy,” an anonymous NYU junior, took the stage to tell exactly how, and why, she had no choice but to become a prostitute to meet NYU’s soaring price.

Source: With No Other Choice, This Student Resorted to Prostitution to Meet NYU’s Soaring Price

The owner of the barbers was confused, because he didn’t have the tools to cut a woman’s hair, and his shop was advertised as a men’s barbers

Source: Barber shop owner fined $750 for refusing to cut a woman’s hair

Women go topless for #FreetheNipple walk

Hundreds showed support for Kentucky’s first march, part of a nationwide campaign.

Standing on a picnic table in the Highlands’ Willow Park, 18-year-old Nan Elpers removed her top as cameras started to roll.

Stone-faced, she held her shirt to her side, taking in the scene. Beside her on the table, women held #FreetheNipple posters. In front of her, hundreds of men, women and children stopped talking to take photos or show support. Within seconds, many of them started to applaud.

It was a good turnout for Kentucky’s first #FreetheNipple walk, where hundreds of men and women joined a national movement that has sparked similar marches in 60 other cities around the world — including a recent Manhattan march that drew 300 topless women.

In the Cherokee Triangle park Saturday, dozens of still-covered women waited for Elpers to talk.

“Lina Esco started this campaign in New York to change public policy,” Elpers told the audience. “She did that. In New York, this is legal. In Kentucky, this is legal. This is not a protest. This is a promotion of the understanding, the acceptance and the personal acceptance of women’s bodies. We are not here to change laws. We are here to change minds.”

Women and men of all ages and sizes removed their shirts to participate in the walk, which headed from the park down Bardstown Road to the Douglass Loop and back, passing two farmers markets, numerous restaurants and dozens of filming men along the way.

Arric Fendwick, holding his phone camera up at an intersection on Bardstown Road, said he was filming the march for friends who didn’t believe it was happening.

“It is a shocking thing,” Fendwick said, “because it’s in the city limits, not on a nudist campus or on a beach or in a private home, in a backyard. It is shocking seeing women getting together, bonding and doing something they feel is a positive thing. … It’s a new generation now. Do what you feel.”

Twelve Louisville Metro Police Department officers escorted the march, blocking traffic and keeping the marchers to the sidewalks. Elpers said she was grateful for the city’s support after the event took on a life of its own, far exceeding the response she anticipated when she first made a Facebook event inviting friends to join her in the cause.

“One of the things that has been so important to me and made this event so much more real is that I’ve gotten comments from women and girls I know, then on Facebook, people that I’ve never met before have given me their very personal reasons for supporting this campaign and why they need it,” Elpers said.

Mariah Harrod and Michelle Kim, students at Centre College, drove from Danville, Ky., to attend the march after learning of the campaign through supporter and pop culture icon Miley Cyrus.

“I think it’s definitely time and it’s clearly unfair that women can’t reveal their nipples in a social setting without being like considered immoral, scandalized or even possibly arrested,” Harrod said.

Several of the women participating said they were unsure if they’d take off their tops or show their support while remaining clothed, but some chose to remove their shirts after seeing dozens of other women do so.

“That’s a huge thing,” Elpers said, “because this is as much a self-acceptance campaign as it is a public acceptance campaign, and it’s been really powerful for a lot of people here.”

Reach reporter Bailey Loosemore at 502-582-4646 or bloosemore@courier-journal.com.

Source: Women go topless for #FreetheNipple walk

Three more motorists have been confirmed killed by defective General Motors ignition switches, bringing the death toll to 80.

Source: General Motors’ death toll rises to 80 in ignition-switch crisis

Source: A Doll’s House – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

A Kentucky mom shared her frustrations with a local high school’s dress code after her daughter was allegedly sent to the principal’s office for wearing an outfit that revealed her collarbone.

Mom Stacie Dunn posted a photo of her daughter Stephanie on the first day of school wearing the “inappropriate” outfit in question.

In the caption, she wrote, “So this is my daughter at school today. I had to come to the school because according to her school principal what she is wearing is out of dress code and inappropriate for school.”

Dunn said that when she arrived at the school, she saw a group of female students in the principal’s office for similar dress code violations. “This is ridiculous! WOODFORD County High School and the principle have been enforcing a dress code where as girls can not show even there collar bones [sic] because it may distract their male class mates,” she wrote on Facebook. “Parents are being called away from their important jobs and students are missing important class time because they are showing their collarbones! Something needs to change!”

After receiving a phone call from the school about Stephanie’s dress code violation, Dunn brought her daughter a scarf to wear. But the saga continued when the outfit was still deemed inappropriate and the teen was ultimately sent home after “giving the principal an attitude,” the mom claims in a follow-up Facebook post.

The following day, the mom launched a petition to help Stephanie and her fellow students change their school’s dress code. It currently has over 4,300 signtatures.

Woodford County High School’s 10-year-old dress code has been a source of tension in the past. In March, student Maggie Sunseri released a documentary featuring a series of interviews with female students, as well as the school principal, Rob Akers.

Titled “Shame: A Documentary on School Dress Code,” the 33-minute film highlights some of the students’ issues with the dress code, which mandates that shirts cover their collarbones and that shorts and skirts to be knee-length or longer.

Though Stacie Dunn’s daughter Stephanie is not featured in the film, the girls interviewed express the same kinds of concerns she shared this week. They say they feel embarrassed and ashamed about being “called out” for “revealing” outfits that show their collarbones, that it’s difficult to find acceptable clothes for schools, that the rules are not uniformly enforced and that it’s absurd to be forced to missed class because of these unfair standards.

As a result, they say they feel distracted with worry about whether or not each teacher will deem their outfits appropriate and fear that they may be humiliated.

In the documentary, Principal Akers cites removing distraction as a motivating factor behind dress codes, though he adds he was not at Woodford County High School when this particular policy was implemented during the 2004-05 school year. In his past experience as an administrator, he says, “issues with sexual harassment” among students prompted stricter dress codes.

“Certain outfits that [female students] wore created this situation where guys would make inappropriate statements, and there was a distraction to the learning environment based on what some of the folks were wearing at school,” he says in the film.

But the girls believe that it’s unfair to limit female students’ clothing options instead of addressing the harassment issues more directly with male students. “It sends the message to boys that it’s all girls’ fault, basically — any reaction or any action that they do is the girl’s fault,” one girl says in the film. “It wasn’t their fault that they were staring or got distracted. It’s the girls’ fault.”

In an interview with The Huffington Post this week, Sunseri said the inspiration behind her film and her opposition to the dress code “has little to do with clothing and more to do with the underlying message behind a code that tells young women to cover up and young boys that they can’t control themselves.” The 16-year-old high school junior said the dress code is sexist toward both girls and boys in that it “perpetuates the notion that a woman’s body is inherently more sexual than a man’s body, and that young boys’ natural tendencies are to harass or assault women.”

Sunseri added that she believes this is a widespread problem in schools and greater society across the nation, not just at Woodford County High School. “This is a time when we are already trying to figure out our place in the world, and on top of that we are made to feel guilty about the body parts we were born with.”

Principal Akers told HuffPost in response to last week’s incident that his school’s dress code is not about “sexualizing the collarbone” but having “measurable” metrics that allow the rules to be applied fairly. He also added that he’s always been open to discussing students’ concerns and making adjustments to the rules but that no one has ever tried to meet with him.

Until now. Since the recent incident with Stacie Dunn and her daughter Stephanie, Sunseri has come forward with a proposal for a new dress code. After making small changes to the proposal in a meeting with Principal Akers’, she presented it at a school meeting on August 17 in front of a council of parents, teachers and administrators. According to Akers and Sunseri, the council moved the proposal to a committee for review and asked the junior to put together a group of students to join the committee in this task. Then, the council as a whole will consider a proposal from the committee at the next meeting on September 21.

Sunseri’s proposed dress code, which she considers an exercise in compromise, would allow for sleeveless shirts with straps that are at least three fingertips wide, skirts and dresses that meet the “fingertip rule” for length and shirts that meet the “credit card rule” — a credit card length from the bottom of the throat to the top of the shirt. The rules would also permit leggings and yoga pants as long as a top covered the front and back sides. If passed, the code would go into effect in January.

Stacie Dunn expressed her joy at the prospect for real change in a Facebook post. “Hopefully the outcome will be favorable!” she wrote. Principal Akers told HuffPost that he applauds Sunseri’s initiative, both in making the documentary and following through with tangible action.

“Everyone always wanted the dress code to change, but no one was willing to do anything about it, Sunseri said in her interview, adding, “I hope that anyone reading my story feels empowered to go out and make changes within their own community.”

 

The Ridiculous Dress Code Rule That Made This Teen’s Outfit ‘Inappropriate’.

Women ask me all the time about what they’re supposed to do about the men out there who say they only want younger women in their profiles.

I remember seeing it too but I never let it stop me from favoring a man and it shouldn’t stop you either.

But the question has always intrigued me so I did a little research to find out more about why this is happening and whether or not it’s true.

I started with an old boyfriend of mine who is 11 years older than me.

He told me it was an ego thing. He felt like women who were younger would make him feel more youthful and keep him active.

He and I were from completely different generations. Although he was on the cusp of being a boomer, he was actually at the tale end of what’s called the Silent Generation.

Some of our values and views of life were different and that created conflict, which ultimately ended our love relationship.

We’ve stayed friends but when we broke up, I suggested that he start dating women closer to his age, sharing that he’d have more in common with him than he and I did.

At first he taken aback, but guess what? He now dates women whose ages are within five years of his.

It turns out these women were not only great … they also kept him on his toes, often outdoing him when it comes to activities.

It just took someone gently pointing out the benefits for him to make the switch.

Next I went to my friend Ron who has taught me so much about men and what they are looking for.

When I posed this question to him, he said men have this idea of what they want but most men still look at women their own age and will contact them regardless of age if they are attracted to their picture online.

When he was dating, Ron would date women up to five years older than he was. His girlfriend now is about a year older than he is.

He told me the problem is women post pictures that make them look old. (Sound familiar? Think of all the men you thought looked old enough to be your grandfather!)

He said that alone stopped him from ever looking at a woman’s profile regardless of her age.

But if a woman’s look appealed to him, he’d view her profile and contact her if he liked what he saw.

I talked to my old high school boyfriend about this subject since I knew he’d dated younger women.

By the way, he is the ultimate handsome bad boy and women often drop their numbers written on business cards and napkins into his hand. They even do it when he’s having dinner with another woman.

Anyway, after his marriage ended, he admits he checked out younger women. He thought it would be fun.

He found he had absolutely nothing in common with them. And once the lure of sex wore off, he was bored.

He went back to women closer to his age as well.

I’ve brought up this older man/younger woman subject a lot to more men than just these three and their answers are similar to what I’ve shared with you.

So what can you do to get these guys’ attention in your profile?

You must have a fantastic picture that makes you look like you have great energy and are fun.

Your profile has to trigger a man’s heart to say, Hey, she might be the one. She sounds AMAZING!

When you read your profile, does it make you sound amazing or is it a resume of who you are?

And finally, you have to invite a man to write you without demands attached if he’s interested.

Lisa Copeland is known as the expert on over 50’s dating. She’s the best-selling author of The Winning Dating Formula For Women Over 50 and her mission is to help as many women around the world as she can discover how to have fun dating and finding their Mr. Right after 50. To get your FREE Report, “5 Little Known Secrets To Find A Quality Man,” visit www.findaqualityman.com.

via Do Men Over 50 Only Want Younger Women? | Lisa Copeland.

Placing the sex toy — which resembles a woman’s private parts — on the coffee table, I gently demonstrate to our client how to perform oral sex.

“Think about what you’re doing with your tongue,” I tell him. “It’s a little like what I taught you about French kissing last week.”

My husband, Rob, who is teaching the session with me, weighs in. “See how she varies the pace?” he asks. “That’s the best way to bring her to orgasm.”

Wide-eyed and curious, our client, a 23-year-old virgin, takes his turn after I’ve thoroughly washed the prop. It takes a bit of trial and error, but he eventually picks up the technique. Rob and I smile at each other knowingly — it feels good to be helping this guy out.

To an outsider, sex coaching might seem a little strange. But to men like the virgin, a college student, we’re an invaluable resource. We might not be formally trained sex therapists, but — as a kinky couple who enjoy opening up our sex life to others — we’ve got a lot to offer.

Modal Trigger

Photo: Anne Wermiel

It all started four years ago, after Rob and I began advertising ourselves online as a high-end escort couple specializing in threesomes with single men.

We wanted to spice up our sex life. It was all aboveboard and legal. Clients paid for our time, but if we were attracted to them and had sex with them, the sex happened on our own time and didn’t cost a dime. We were very strict about that.

One of our favorite things was putting on voyeurs’ shows, where the guy watched Rob and me fooling around.

Sometimes the guests joined in, but mostly they liked to watch. They were nearly always married, heterosexual men who wanted to indulge in a bisexual fantasy.

After a while, though, we became something of an agony aunt and uncle, because these men liked to share their problems with us. They’d talk about how they never had sex with their wives, or how they felt they’d be laughed at if they revealed their fantasies to anybody other than us.

One of our favorite things was putting on voyeurs’ shows, where the guy watched Rob and me fooling around. Sometimes the guests joined in, but mostly they liked to watch.

Soon, the escort side of things evolved into sex coaching. I showed one man who hadn’t had sex with his wife for 20 years how to bring romance back into their lives. Why spend money seeing us or an escort girl when you can hire a baby sitter and treat your wife to a date night? Rob and I taught him to use massage to get his spouse in the mood. I even went so far as to help him book a spa day for his wife before taking her to a luxury hotel for dinner and an overnight stay. And you know what? They finally made love.

I also helped another man who came to us to discuss his fantasies — including having sex with a mysterious Russian woman. He didn’t want to cheat on his wife, though, because he loved her very much. I told him to go out and buy his wife a wig and gently suggest that they role-play. The last time I heard from him, he was the mailman and she played the bored housewife!

All in all, we love what we do, and we’re hoping to expand our business with a YouTube channel and possibly a reality TV show. In the meantime, we’re grateful for the effect that sharing our sexuality has had on our marriage. We’re closer than ever because we get turned on by the fantasies our clients express. It makes for a far better sex life for us.

— As told to Jane Ridley

 

Meet the married couple who gives guys hands-on sex lessons | New York Post.

It’s World Breastfeeding Week and this got us thinking about how breastfeeding is equal parts wonderful and difficult for too many women today.

The American Academy of Pediatrics has long recommended that women breastfeed children to age one, a goal a lot of women find nearly impossible. With a typical paid maternity leave (if there is any paid leave at all) of just 12 weeks, many women end up back in the workplace far sooner than the one-year mark. And those moms often struggle with time constraints, policies that discourage breastfeeding, and finding clean, private spaces to pump breast milk. (Although that last one is true for nursing women in general.)

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In 2012, McDonald’s was famously investigated by the U.S. Department of Labor in 2012 when a new mom was forced to clock out and reduce her hours in order to walk to a library to pump breast milk. (McDonald’s did respond to the investigation by paying back the employee’s lost wages and restoring her hours, but still.)

The good news is the tide may be changing, thanks to the hard work of breastfeeding advocates. With every sad story of a mom being shamed that goes viral, more people realize how important breastfeeding really is. One concrete example: the companies listening and making it easier for moms to feed their babies.

Our hat is off to these three large companies, which have instituted pro-breastfeeding policies for their employees or customers and are setting a great example for others in the process.

RELATED: 10 Myths and Facts About Breastfeeding

Netflix

It’s been a big week for Netflix employees, which announced that its offering employees a full year of paid maternity or paternity leave. This will undoubtedly make it easier for new moms to reach the recommendation of breastfeeding babies until age one. “This new policy, combined with our unlimited time off, allows employees to be supported during the changes in their lives and return to work more focused and dedicated,” Tawni Cranz, Netflix’s Chief Talent Officer, said on the company’s blog.

IBM

Moms who are nursing and traveling on business often have to ‘pump and dump,’ or throw out their breast milk because it is too complicated and expensive to ship or carry home. Not anymore, says IBM. The tech giant will launch a novel program in September that will provide moms with everything they need to ship their breast milk home while they are traveling for work.

According to the Washington Post, the new program will start with an app that will allow women to enter the travel location and choose how many temperature-controlled packages she will need to ship her breast milk home. IBM will deliver pre-addressed packages to the hotel’s front desk, ready for the employee to use.

RELATED: Breastfeeding May Reduce the Risk of the Most Common Childhood Cancer

Target

Target’s breastfeeding policy, recently posted on Facebook by Breastfeeding Mama Talk, has been getting kudos. The company supports breastfeeding “in any area” of their stores and states that, “If you see a woman breastfeeding in our stores, do not approach her. If she approaches you and asks for a location to breastfeed, offer the fitting room (do not offer the restroom as an option).” That’s a vast improvement over 2011, when breastfeeding women staged a ‘nurse in’ to protest the fact that a breastfeeding mom in Texas was asked to cover up in the store.

Helping to alleviate the worries of nursing moms is definitely a worthy cause more businesses should get behind.

RELATED: How This Breastfeeding Mom Fought Back Against A Stranger Who Shamed Her on Facebook

via 3 Companies That Are Getting It Right for Breastfeeding Moms – Health News and Views – Health.com.

Of course in the article at Jezebel nowhere does it suggest actually fucking your husband yourself. God (along with all gay misandry twisted female predators) forbid suggesting any kind of affection be actid out upon a male such as a simple hand job, or the never allowed to be mentioned fellatio.  Fuck no.  Just keep that husband celibate while you have your girlfriends lick you.

He fucked the nanny because you do not like dick and she does……

In light of recent controversies absolutely rocking the nanny industry—a near-confirmed Ben Affleck affair, a rumored Gavin Rossdale affair—the New York Post has offered some advice for safeguarding your marriage.

First, they recommend avoiding hot 20-something nannies altogether, which seems like fairly reasonable advice if you’re married to an actor with sociopathic tendencies. One woman interviewed for the article adheres to this notion, and “has a middle-aged nanny she adores.”

According to Seth Norman Greenberg, VP of Pavillion Agency, “more and more clients are requesting pictures of candidates along with their bios,” which could spell bad news for any nannies cursed with a reasonably attractive face.

But if you are determined to hire someone fuckable to care for your children, the Post has several helpful tips for desexualizing them in the eyes of your wayward, ungovernable brute of a husband. One suggestion, offered by Greenberg, is a dress code of “chinos and a button-down shirt.” Here are some additional suggestions that The Post appears to have left out:

Limit your nanny’s showering privileges to once a fortnight.

Deprive your nanny of Vitamin D. Do not, under any circumstances, allow her outdoors.

Ask your nanny to kill and butcher all of the meat served to your family. Capture it on your nanny cam, and email a supercut to your husband.

Force your nanny to share a closet with your 12-year-old daughter. See how good she looks in low-rise Hollister pants, size double-zero!

Break your nanny’s pelvis.

Take your husband to the first performance of your nanny’s level 1 improv class.

Marry a gay man.

Marry a good person.

via Best Practices For Preventing Your Husband From Fucking the Nanny .

(Repeats without change to widen distribution)

By Leah Schnurr

(Reuters) – Canada’s prim capital is suddenly focused more on the state of people’s affairs than the affairs of the state.

One in five Ottawa residents allegedly subscribed to adulterers’ website Ashley Madison, making one of the world’s coldest capitals among the hottest for extra-marital hookups – and the most vulnerable to a breach of privacy after hackers targeted the site.

Hackers threatened to leak details including the credit card information, nude photos, sexual fantasies and real names of as many as 37 million customers worldwide of Ashley Madison, which uses the slogan: “Life is short. Have an affair.”

The website’s Canadian parent, Avid Life Media, said it had since secured the site and was working with law enforcement agencies to trace those behind the attack.

“Everybody says Ottawa is a sleepy town and here we are with 200,000 people running around on each other,” said municipal employee Jon Weaks, 27, as he took a break at an outdoor cafe near the nation’s Parliament.

“I think a lot of people will be questioned tonight at dinner,” added colleague Ali Cross, 28.

Some 189,810 Ashley Madison users were registered in Ottawa, a city with a population of about 883,000, making the capital No. 1 for philanderers in Canada and potentially the highest globally per capita, according to previously published figures from the Toronto-based company.

The one bright spot for millions of Ashley Madison’s nervous clients is that the hack appears to be an inside job, according to police and intelligence sources. Avid Life has also said it is convinced the hackers were formerly connected to the company.

That means, for now at least, the perpetrators are driven by ideological and not commercial motives.

The hackers, who referred to customers as “cheating dirtbags who deserve no discretion,” appear uninterested in blackmailing individual clients, unlike an organized crime outfit.

“If it had been organized, they wouldn’t have advertised it,” said a law enforcement source who spoke on condition of anonymity. “But there’s going to be a lot of people with lots of explaining to do.”

The hotbed of infidelity was also the seat of power: The top postal code for new members matched that of Parliament Hill, according to Avid Live chief executive Noel Biderman in a newspaper report published earlier this year.

Biderman said capital cities around the world typically top subscription rates, a phenomenon he chalks up to “power, fame and opportunity,” along with the risk-taking personalities that find themselves in political cities.

The Ottawa mayor’s office and city council either declined to comment or did not return emails.

The hackers want Avid Life to shut down the website, as well as a second one it runs, EstablishedMen.com which is widely described as a “sugar daddy site,” but has no issues with CougarLife.com, a site for older women looking for hookups.

“In our buttoned-down city, it may not be acceptable to openly explore outside of a committed relationship,” said Ottawa marriage counselor Nataxja Cini.

In a city full of professionals with demanding careers, many in government, Cini said marriage may come under more strain than usual. But with a stable family life still a badge of success, an Ashley Madison subscription may be preferable to divorce, she said.

To be sure, the subscription data may not be that reliable.

A former employee sued Avid Life, saying she had developed debilitating wrist pain, insomnia and anxiety while writing 1,000 fake profiles for a Brazilian version of Ashley Madison, according to court records. The case was dismissed earlier this year.

Still, one Ottawa resident, who declined to give her last name, said it is unsurprising the small government town is home to so many Ashley Madison clients.

“In a blue collar city, they’re not going to use a website, they’re going to do it at a bar,” said Kary, 38. In Ottawa “you can’t run the risk of someone seeing you at a bar doing that.”

The town is also not famed for its rollicking social scene.

“Why do you think everyone goes to Montreal to have a good time?” she added. “Ottawa is the city fun forgot.” (Additional reporting by Andrea Hopkins and Alastair Sharp in Toronto, Allison Lampert in Montreal; Editing by Alan Crosby)

 

RPT-Ottawa, the city fun forgot, tops on infidelity website | Reuters.

“Why do you need to choose love or sex over the other fun things that don’t have the potential for pain and suffering?”

via Middle-aged virgins: Why so many Japanese stay chaste – CNN.com.

Communal Abuse and Cults

Communal Abuse and Cults

Communal abuse is a type of abuse that is exerted, in part, by victims (survivors) upon each other in the course of aspiring for something good within a intentional community. Community abuse is almost always masterminded by a leader, and one hallmark of an abusive community is leader-on-member personal abuse. This abusive proclivity comes largely from the psychopathic qualities of the leader, which pre-date and usually explain the formation of the group. However, the availability of a large quantity of ‘de-selfed,’ vulnerable victims is explained by the overall workings of the abusive community. In effect, it perpetuates survivor-on-survivor abuse.

Abusive communities are often called cults. A consensus definition of “cult” has been hard to reach in our society, because there exist separatist or isolationist communities, that, while very different from the mainstream, are not abusive. Attempts have been made to define cults by aspects of high demands, total commitment, or unusual beliefs. High demands and insistence on total commitment can be part of cult technique but also part of excellence, such as in the Navy Seals. Defining cults by the beliefs held has been tricky, because freedom of belief is part of individual integrity. Poorly implemented attempts to define or identify cults in the end helps those communities that are abusive, by sowing doubt.

Better discriminative criteria are needed. This page instead defines communal abuse by the systematic traits that weaken all common members’ cognitive and self-protective functions. These traits have been in evidence in diverse groups, such as Stalin’s Soviet Union, multi-level marketing schemes, some religious sects, ‘utopian’ intentional communities, some non-profits, and some psychotherapy movements.

Abusive communities exist on a spectrum as far as controllingness goes. It seems useful to think in terms of two tiers of such communities: a tier of fervent communities that are formed around a sincere belief but devolve into abusive practices, and manipulated communities, that combine a psychopathic leader and strong conditioning against self-protection. Many communities are manipulated from the beginning, but it is possible for a fervent community to ‘cross-over’ into a manipulated community as the leader functions in an accountability vacuum and moves into more extreme abuse.

Communal abuse has a unclear, perhaps limited overlap with intimate partner violence. Both do entail the misuse of human attachment needs. Also, there is a type of damage in common, that of ‘de-selfing’, so some understanding is perhaps useful for survivors of domestic abuse as well as survivors of communal abuse.

The Fundamental Vulnerability

No belief, simple, profound, or bizarre, by itself, is able to keep a large number of people cohesively together through abusive experiences. Rather such communities misuse normal attachment behavior. With rare exception, people feel insecure because they do not feel unconditionally acceptable. This leads to trying to find and fulfill the conditions of achieving unconditional acceptance. This of course is a contradiction but it is a common situation. Abusive communities promise unconditional acceptance, (often in the form of realizing some perfected state or afterlife outcome in which one is so manifestly good one cannot be rejected). Then life in that community becomes one condition after another. Members are often led to believe they have unconditional acceptance and that what is asked is to be an expression of gratitude but the truth comes out when they fail or try to decline.

It is a myth that members of an abusive community are mentally or emotionally troubled upon joining. Actually such individuals are usually rejected because their sensitivity would lead them to exhibit distress from maltreatment publicly. What is wanted are individuals that are able to hide their suffering from themselves and others.

The First Threshold

The first threshold of abuse in communities seems to be the disallowance of any balance point between the needs of the group and the needs of the individual. This is not to say the individual is encouraged to prioritize the group needs way above his or her own, but rather it is not allowed to even think in these terms. That is, the self doesn’t exist. This is the ultimate negation of the self. This is loss of autonomy. This sets the stage for the exploitation of members.

The Second Threshold

The second threshold of abuse is blind obedience Doing whatever the leadership asks is either held as the highest virtue, or the strongest sign of virtue. This is not reasonable deference in the service of discipline or formation, it is unquestioning obedience. It is not fidelity to a principle or a cause but to a person. Humans generally find it easier to be loyal to a person than to an idea, this is attachment behavior. Abusive communities always identify compliance or surrender as the greatest good.

Obedience becomes a powerful tool for manipulation, because anything, even harmful acts, or acts contrary to putative beliefs, can be made ‘good’ by making them the subject of obedience to the leadership. This is how people trying to be good can be made to do bad things. The reason many countries compile lists of cults is because a large number of very obedient people always poses a potential security risk. This is loss of integrity. This sets the stage for the exploitation of others by the members.

Conditioning

Conditioning is modifying behavior by linking desired responses to events that would not elicit those responses spontaneously. In abusive communities the desired response is always compliance. Conditioning starts by pairing something that normally would elicit compliance, like a gift, with something that would not necessarily elicit compliance like a difficult demand. After a time, a difficult demand tends to bring out compliance by itself. Conditioning decays if not renewed but in a controlled setting renewal becomes part of the routine.

Other Common Elements of Communal Control

  • Special Leader. The rightness of the community is believed to reside not in set beliefs, not in long-established practices, not in durable principles, but in the guidance of the present leadership, which is the only source of truth. Because of this, ideology and rules may change quickly or even reverse. This is a set-up for manipulation.
  • Doctrine of Depravity This is the belief that members instincts, desires, tendencies, feelings, and inclinations, can’t be trusted. If these things agree with the leadership fine, but if they do not, it is evidence of just how much the member needs the community. By definition, any assertion of self-interest becomes wrong, and any boundary, which is a product of self-interest is also wrong. Also, the naturalness or ease of an action (or its opposite) no longer can be used as a criterion of healthiness.
  • Panders to Dependency Needs Every adult has a residual desire to be taken care of by strong and wise parents (but this cannot work for adults). Abusive communities offer, usually unconsciously, the illusion of unconditional parental care by using paternalistic metaphors and protecting members from adult decisions. Dependency that is indulged in this way grows in the members over time making leaving even more unthinkable. Many daily routines in abusive communities, while exhausting, have a ‘pre-school’ quality to them.
  • Communal Living This limits or eliminates non-believing influences, eliminates privacy, and prevents cognitive re-grouping. It is essential for ‘milieu control’ as defined in the next section. It also severs prior relationships with neighborhoods or settings. Travelers are often preferred for recruitment because they have no previous ties to the larger community.
  • Communal Businesses. This extends all the aspects of communal living to work time. Usually members are expected to give up previous jobs, even skilled professions and work only in these businesses.
  • Cloaked Recruitment. Often free classes are offered, or some very low commitment meeting is advertised. The name the group is commonly known by is not used, lest that alert potential recruits. These meeting may be ‘packed’ with group members who are posing as new people, and these confederates evince great enthusiasm to influence potential recruits. As any interest is shown, slightly more committed activities are presented as a way to pursue this interest. Extreme friendliness and ‘love-bombing’ is applied at this stage, so that later if there is hesitancy when more is requested, hurt and betrayal can be simulated to pressure the recruit to stay.
  • Controlled Sex and Romance. A fundamental practice is to prevent members from forming any alliance or loyalty other than to the leader and the group. This extends to sex and romance because that forms a strong bond. Mostly commonly celibacy, (except for the leader) is enforced, even for married couples. Also commonly, the leader will put couples together or separate couples. Less commonly, having sex with anyone that asks is expected. This elimination of selection has the same effect of keeping bonds from forming. Or marital sex may be allowed, but special clothing or routines are required, which eliminates the spontaneity and passion.
  • No Lateral Attachments. Friendship based on feeling are discouraged, even within the group. If people are close, they may be moved around to break it up. Even pets are usually discouraged.
  • Leaving is Taboo. Whatever the ideology, it always includes a doctrine that membership must be lifelong. Because there is no such thing as ‘trying it out for a while’ critical thinking and considerations of whether the experience is agreeable go out the window. It also blocks the natural human response to maltreatment (which is to leave).
  • Devaluing the Outsider This has many functions: 1) Isolates members from opposing ideas, 2) Isolates members from sources of attachment that would compete with the leader or community, 3) mobilizes the survival drive in members which is channeled into cult activities, 4) justifies deceptive practices, 5) provides a target to safely displace anger at oppressive conditions.
  • Children Raised in Common. This is to weaken parent child bonds, which like romantic and sexual relationships, would divide loyalties. Children are indoctrinated into beliefs, that is, neither critical thinking nor comparison is not allowed. The leader may keep all parental authority to her or himself. Because children tend to be natural truth-tellers, there is a rush to get children to adopt an (approved) adult perspective and not “just be kids.”
  • Elimination of Leisure. In an abusive community, there is no time off, not unstructured time, no days off, no vacations, no sabbaticals, and no retirement. There is usually an enormous amount of physical work, and inefficiencies are sometimes maintained on purpose. Other time is usually spent in directed study or groups. This eliminates time to think, to reflect, to observe closely, to form real friendships, or to debate matters. It also forms the core of economic exploitation.
  • Greed This is unique to multi-level marketing (MLM) but it is how such organizations work. Ostensibly MLM is not a controlling situation, in that participants usually do not live together, are free to read what they want etc.. However, in order to advance levels, participants must ‘voluntarily’ invest themselves in the cognitive frame and the activities of the organization. If one stays only at the entry level, one expends more than one gets. Some participants do stay at the periphery because they do not have the skill set to advance, but this is contrary to their objective. The situation is one in which skepticism is penalized monetarily and aggressive gullibility and proselytizing is rewarded. Ingeniously, most of the abuse is self-imposed.
  • Ladders. Everyone is comforted by evidence that he or she is ‘getting somewhere.’ But in adult life, there are very few concrete systems that provide that. Abusive communities both provide different positions of status to obtain, and a closed group in which the status is uniformly recognized. Compliance is either covertly or openly the criteria for promotion, and so an unquestioning attitude is given incentive. It goes without saying that all progress on the ladder can be lost for dissent or leaving.
  • Secrecy. Key parts of what happens in the group are kept secret certainly from the outside, but also from a large portion of the membership. Often what is kept secret are practices or beliefs that actually contradict the more benign information that is used for recruitment.
  • A Security Force This is not always present but when it is, it is used to eliminate dissent. It may even have uniforms and a para-military flavor. It is justified on the basis of security and protection of members. Security always rationalizes and disguises loss of freedom. This force is always somewhat privileged which creates a feeling of being an insider which intensifies loyalty and obedience for the force members. These members can be trusted with ‘secrets’ because secrecy seems justified to security personnel. Sometimes the security force is called a crisis or mental health force.
  • Dissent Labeled as Mental Illness The Soviet Union is famous for locking dissidents up in mental hospitals. Other abusive communities may not have locked hospitals at their disposal but labeling a dissident as ‘crazy’ is still effective at undermining the dissenting message and creating fear of thinking in unorthodox ways. Merely expelling a dissenter lends some credibility or requires an explanation. Also because of the extreme pressure to conform, dissent where it does happen, usually is released only when a member is at her or his wit’s end and is perhaps hysterical or emotionally distressed.
  • Manipulated Aspiration. There is a natural tendency for humans to want to outdo others to prove worthiness. This is just as or even more true inside an abusive community. The leadership often understands that dictating an oppressive practice can cause resistance, even if silent resistance. Instead, the leadership suggests that those members who do X are ‘doing well’ or favored, but indicate it is optional. X is usually something very time consuming (fund-raising 16 hours a day, meditating long hours etc) or is actually impossible so that the seeking of it is all consuming. When members seek to be favored in this way, the motivation is internal (even though it has been manipulated) and so resistance is bypassed. Eventually, the practice becomes a group norm.
  • The Emperor’s Clothes This is a familiar tactic of manipulation where it is suggested that something very fine is happening when in fact nothing is happening. To make it work further, it is suggested that only the refined can appreciate what is happening. Very quickly an insecure group member will say (and often believe) that he or she actually sees it happening. This starts a chain reaction in which almost always everyone goes along or at least keeps silent.
  • Compartmentalization. As the bond of the member to the group becomes stronger and stronger, he or she is incrementally allowed to know secrets. The cognitive and moral dissonance is counter-balanced with feeling special and time invested. This is really a form of grooming. Also no one is allowed to know everything that is going on. This keeps members divided and confused.
  • Involuntary Transgressions or ‘Thought Crime’ Thoughts, desires, and doubts that deviate from the approved agenda are stigmatized as betrayals. Since everyone has these whether they want them or not, this has the effect of keeping everyone feeling guilty. It also keeps conversations superficial because no one wants to share what they are really thinking.
  • Constant Guilt It is hinted if not plainly stated that members are not doing enough, or are doing wrong things. This keeps any of them from feeling they the standing to question or oppose anything.
  • Altered States. These are states of mind that are discontinuous with the one’s usual state of mind. Examples are from meditation, hyperventilation, hypnosis, fasting, restraining bodily functions unnaturally, chanting, prayer, sensory deprivation, sauna or sweat lodge, extended aerobic exercise, or sleep deprivation. All these methods, in modest doses, can have a role in personal growth. In fact most initiates coming out of the mainstream culture are grateful for being shown a more biological, sensory based experience than they were aware of. Altered states do not intrinsically lead to spiritual or emotional development, nor are they themselves evidence of it. They do have the effect of making all information, memory, and history of the ‘usual state’ seem irrelevant or inferior. The role this has in separating the pre-community experience from community experience is obvious. Commonly the altered state is misidentified as actually being or being near some desired special blissful state, and so great harm can arise from over-indulgence or trying to ‘push through.’ This harm can be sickness or death, but also cognitive disorganization or weakening.

Tactics and Traits of a Cult Leader

What is of the greatest interest in understanding manipulated communities is “how he or she does it.” That is, how does a leader that clearly from the outside does not provide good guidance or example manage to attract and retain devoted, even worshipful followers. Some of the traits below make the cult possible, others are made possible by the cult’s existence. There often is no clear distinction to be made between the two. Unlike a legitimate spiritual tradition, many cults fall apart after the leaders death because his or her machinations were necessary to keep it going.

  • Self Promotion Leaders do not hesitate to put themselves forward as able to do great or incredible things. Because lack of humility on this scale is unusual, there is a tendency for many to believe it!
  • Doubtlessness Total lack of doubt is only seen in psychopaths, but for the doubt-ridden it is taken as evidence of knowing the right thing to do. And later, if the facade crumbles, it will be taken as a sign of sincerity!
  • Above Accountability The leader is held out as different from ordinary mortals. Often the leader is said to be picked by God. The leader then has different ‘rules’ (really no rules) and lives very differently than members, often lavishly. This privilege, wealth, and adoration is often the real reason the leader has founded the community. The disparity is usually concealed, but to the extent it is not concealed it is rationalized as necessary for the leader to do his or her ‘special’ work.
  • Claims to Be Goodness. That is, the leader doesn’t only claim to ‘know’ goodness but to be it. Therefore anything the leader does or wants is good, without question. This dovetails with the doctrine of obedience for members.
  • Pressure-Release Skillful manipulators push a target with negative attention, then suddenly become nice. When pressure is suddenly released, the target experiences relief feelings which are pleasant and lead to feelings of gratitude, even if the very same person was the one being abusive.
  • Intermittent Reinforcement This emanates from the pressure release described above but it is a stronger and different effect. Warm supportive treatment is provided unpredictably amongst abusive treatment. The way intermittent reinforcement works is that when the reinforcement doesn’t come, the person learns to keep trying because it will come eventually. In this context it means that abuse becomes a cue to try harder. Abusive leaders are often very skilled in recognizing the breaking point of mistreatment and flipping to warm treatment or rewards.
  • Belief Teasing Most people have a strong need to believe in something meaningful. Adept cult leaders imply that they have something life-altering to believe in, but remain very vague and hazy. This allows members to insert their hopes and dreams, perhaps even unconsciously. It also keeps skepticism and the application of critical thinking at bay.
  • Hides Behind Interpretation Ambiguous passages in ancient texts will be interpreted to fit the leaders desire. but unlike a request from the leader, to refuse is defy a divine or supernatural power.
  • Pseudo-Esotericism Leaders (like everyone else) often know a few things that are arcane. However, unlike everyone else, they use snippets strategically to suggest deep, thorough, or well reflected understanding which just isn’t there. Gaps may be filled in ad hoc by pure invention. Both the unusualness of the subject and deference to the leader prevent any probing
  • New Dawn Leaders will always indicate that they are doing something new that has never been done before. This defeats any comparison, and is a set-up for flipping good and bad.
  • Power Hunger The group channels considerable money to the top, which spends it not for humanitarian work, but to buy advertising or influence to gain secular or practical power. Members are encouraged to work in positions where they access to political powerful people or organizations. Celebrities may be courted and given special treatment to gain social power.
  • An End that Justifies Any Means. Bringing, say, salvation to the entire world, is a promise that if it was credible, renders any damaging action irrelevant because it will be more than made up for. Manipulative leaders justify everything as means to a fantastic end.
  • Excess Often the leader will collect cars, exotic animals, houses or some other items of value in an indiscriminate, over-the-top way. This contrasts with the general poverty of regular members. While it may seem that this would seem to discredit and expose the leader, it usually has the opposite effect, almost as though there is some symbiosis between the two extremes.
  • Spectacles These are meaningless displays with a lot of sensory elements but no real continuity or function. These act as diversions, and as means of making it seem something profound is happening, without the need for any substance. These differ from legitimate spiritual rituals in that, instead of repetition and reflection, the emphasis is on novelty and distraction.
  • Charisma. The leader often makes an unusually strong or magnetic impression in person. This is usually due to inordinate self-confidence, lack of normal inhibitions, and shallowness of emotions that makes ‘putting it on’ easy. It is often taken as evidence of specialness, however.
  • Naturalness. The leader lacks self-consciousness and has nothing to worry about. Disciples on the other hand, are guilt-ridden, tongue-tied, hesitant, and distrustful of their own impulses. By contrast, the leader seems gifted. The leader appears very independent, which appeals to members struggling with dependent tendencies.
  • Transference Cure A person seeking deeper happiness is vulnerable to identifying with an unnaturally positive appearing person who claims to have it all together. The unconscious fantasy many of us have to ourselves ‘have it together’ is fulfilled in the ‘transference’ and targets do actually feel better. Like all dissociative effects however, this will wane over time. It can set up an ‘addictive’ cycle where the target wants to get ‘deeper’ in the program, or closer to the leader, to keep the transference cure working. Most popular self-help gurus function this way, they provide long talks that imply they have deep truths and are experiencing bliss. Only very general truisms and anecdotes are related however, rarely concrete practices or actual actionable principles..
  • Claiming Unusual Powers or Abilities This always has an attraction for those who feel powerless, because it speaks to the illusion that someone special can come to set things right. There is often the hint that if a disciple is deeply devoted, he or she will get a little bit of special power her- or himself. The leader may claim or imply divinity, or the gift of special powers from divinities or aliens.
  • Performs as a Mentalist This is a way to seemingly back up claims of unusual abilities. A mentalist is a type of performer or illusionist that claims unusual mental, intuitive, or ‘channeling’ abilities. The basic technique employed is ‘cold reading’ in which high probability guesses are made and then misses are minimized or rationalized quickly and ‘hits’ are emphasized and pursued. The target ends up volunteering all the real details although the mentalist will act like they had the details in mind already. The technique is made stronger by doing it in front of a group where is thee is even a higher probability that someone in attendance ‘recognizes’ the guess. Channeling or mediumship is another form of cold reading. ‘Hot reading’ is where information about the target already obtained from some source or from observation is presented like it is being suddenly divined on the spot. Mentalism also exploits the Forer Effect to the maximum.
  • Rewriting History Stalin was famous for this. Outside the Soviet Union it was preposterous because previous history was well-documented, but inside, he controlled information. The protagonist of Orwell’ novel 1984 in fact has a job re-writing history. All effective cult leaders do this. It has the function of making opposition from former disciples disappear, and disguises impulsive changes.
  • Glibness A fast, well-spoken explanation seems true even if it is just double-talk
  • Venality The leader bargains and makes deals with those that cannot be seduced or intimidated in a power-savvy way, never standing on principle.
  • Rewards Informers Members are usually starved for attention from the leader and so informing becomes a means of improving station. This eliminates trust or any breathing room to discuss different points of view.
  • Naked Emperor The leader surrounds him- or herself with uncritical believers, and since there is a tendency to change one’s opinion to conform to consensus, members that do not ‘see’ the attribute believe it is their own failing.
  • Scapegoats Leaders take credit for successes but blame failure on others. Members join in condemning the scapegoat because they are happy it is not them.
  • Bribery This is often used just as a rebellious member is wavering, and it is not seen for what it is, but rather taken or described as healing benevolence.
  • Ad Hoc Policy Changes Rules and practices can change suddenly. This allows coercive actions or manipulations to be disguised as actions for the good of the community. The real reason may even be the leader’s boredom. This ‘off-the-cuff’ quality rather than a sign of not knowing what one is doing, is explained as a mark of inspiration.
  • Keeps Inner Circle This holds out the possibility of advancement or favor to common members, and trains and deputizes the elite members in psychopathic practices. Everyone is kept busy trying to please the leader.
  • Encourages Dependency This is done by encouraging all ties to the outside community, as mentioned, but is also done by discouraging education, forbidding personal property, and moving to remote or different locations.
  • Manipulation of VIPs Celebrities or politicians are wooed and shown a very different experience in order to lend credibility to the cult.
  • Narcissism The leader needs ever greater supplies of admiration, and the community becomes increasing organized around practices of adoration.
  • Thrill-Seeking The utter lack of accountability, and unbridled excess can lead to boredom and disinhibition together. This along with psychopathic traits can lead to thrill seeking, both in nominally acceptable ways such as skydiving, but also in sexual abuse.

Cognitive Abuse and Thought Control

Apart from the tactics of leadership, the cultish qualities of an abusive community are evidenced by cognitive abuse, in which the critical thinking and self-determination abilities of members are weakened and manipulated. Cognitive abuse is very different than addressing skepticism or even defending orthodoxy. In a non-abusive community debate or at least questioning is encouraged-in an abusive community debate and questioning is rendered impossible.

Robert Jay Lifton has famously developed the concept of ‘Thought Reform’, in which he describes eight main ways The result is an inability to detect falsity and exploitation, which often persists even after exiting the community. These eight ways are adapted below to emphasize the abusive aspects for the survivor.

  • Milieu Control. This involves both restriction and manipulation of information and communication within the community. All contact with the outside is controlled and monitored. Reading matter, television, radio and internet are restricted. Conversations that question or analyze what is going on are blocked or interrupted. More nefariously, false or distorted information will be given about the outside, with no opportunity for the member to verify.
  • Mystical Manipulation. False origin stories or very selective accounts are given about the leader to demonstrate divine authority, spiritual advancement, or some exceptional talent or insight that sets the leader and/or group apart from humanity, and that allows reinterpretation of historical events, scripture, and other experiences. This is presented like news or spontaneous story telling, but is in fact planned and orchestrated by the group or its leaders in order to give the impression that the member has only by luck entered something very special.
  • Demand for Purity. The desire for purity is latent in most people as means of being lovable but of course purity is an abstract concept not an actual natural reality for humans or anything else. Abusive communities exploit this common desire by 1) Painting the outside world as impure (which is easy to do) and 2) Promising purity will be obtained through the group. This promise can’t be kept of course, but this will be blamed on the member, who will redouble his or her futile efforts. To discipline wayward members, their impurity will be referenced, as though it was an actual misdeed. When impurity substitutes for badness, all moral compasses are confused, as for instance, when a leader’s intrusive or violating behavior gets designated as desirable because it is purifying.
  • Confession. Sins, as defined by the group, are confessed either to a personal monitor or publicly to the group. There is no confidentiality; members’ “sins,” “attitudes,” and “faults” are discussed and exploited by the leaders. Since the community or leader will define portions of normal human functioning as wrong, members are never ‘without sin.’
  • Sacred Science. The group’s doctrine or ideology is considered to be the ultimate truth, beyond all questioning or dispute. Often the ideology is impractical, illogical, a string of bland truisms. or even gibberish. Members will then fault themselves for failing to understand or not being moved, or they will pretend that they are due to peer pressure. Truth is not to be found outside the group. The leader, as the spokesperson for the truth, is likewise above criticism.
  • Loading the Language. The group interprets or uses words and phrases in new ways so that often the outside world does not understand. This jargon consists of thought-terminating cliches, which serve to alter members’ thought processes to conform to the group’s way of thinking.
  • Doctrine Over Person. Member’s personal experiences or are subordinated to the sacred science. Any contradictory experiences are denied or interpreted as some failing of perception or understanding.
  • Dispensing of Existence. The group has the prerogative to decide who has the right to exist and who does not. This is usually not literal but means that those in the outside world are not saved, unenlightened, unconscious and they must be converted to the group’s ideology. If they do not join the group or are critical of the group, then they must be rejected by the members. Thus, the outside world loses all credibility. In conjunction, should any member leave the group, he or she must be rejected also.

Janja Lalich has added a unique aspect of cognitive abuse:

  • Bounded Choice It is well understood by now that the choices allowed a member in an abusive community are very limited. However, there is a natural human drive to make some choice and have some sense of autonomy. The effects of long-term limitations in choices is to imbue the choices that are made by a member, however bizarre to an outsider, as legitimate and self-determining. Emotional investment in the choices, including the choice to stay, increases over time. A shaky ‘self’ develops around the options taken, even if all the available options had been bad. It is a well-documented social phenomenon, that the worse people are treated, the more loyal they are, because they have developed reasons ‘of their own’ to stay. This is a concept that applies equally to intimate partner violence.

Flo Conway and Jim Siegelman have added a concept of induced brain dysfunction they call snapping, which is perhaps an element of what is popularly called brainwashing:

  • Snapping is a continuous shut down in normal daily critical thinking and mental reconciliation that seems to occur when the mind is overwhelmed by cognitive dissonance, yet the person is in an intense environment that denies dissonance and the possibility of dissonance. Snapping seems to happen suddenly and Conway and Siegelman speculate on a neuro-chemical basis. There is seen in the person a ‘hollowness’ and a personality change in the sense of considerable subtraction from the previous normal personality. Snapping seems to yield when the affected person is allowed/forced/encouraged to use critical thinking and reasoning.

Also some traditional spiritual practices can be applied in excess to disable cognition:

  • Meditation The benefits of judicious meditation are well documented. but the benefits of meditation assume a non-predatory environment. There is an unmistakable high prevalence of meditation practice–always for very long hours–within abusive communities. Besides autonomic relaxation, meditation trains brainwaves to change (lower in frequency) from a preponderance of beta waves (problem solving) to alpha (relaxation) and beyond to theta (inhibition) and delta (absorption and sleep). This is why mediation can address ‘monkey-mind’ very well. However, not only can ‘pushed’ meditation consume all leisure hours, it is intentionally a practice of suspended reasoning. Perhaps meditation eventually can produce a protective wisdom beyond everyday critical thinking. But at an intermediate stage, together with other manipulations, meditation can aid and abet cognitive abuse and thought control.
  • Chanting Cognitive thought occurs in the format of language even when ‘silent’. What is not well known is that even silent thought activates the larynx (voicebox) in an incipient way. Chanting is a way of tying up the voice box with syllables unrelated to thinking, and so thinking is blocked. As with monks and Gregorian chant, or other traditions, a limited amount of this is an aid to true reflection. An excessive amount leads to cognitive disablement. Some cult members are taught to start chanting whenever an outsider tries to reason with them.

 

Finally, what is often the most conspicuous element has to be considered:

  • Bizarre Beliefs Doctrines such as travel to distant planets and remote centuries are common. Such beliefs may or may not be the impetus for the formation of the group, but always they are convenient for cognitive abuse. This is because such beliefs are so outside the normal contextual knowledge of a new member, and so far outside any usual verification framework, that they short-circuit critical thinking.

Exploitative Strategies

  • Overwork Fundraising, recruitment, and working in community businesses for 12 to 20 hours a day is common. This not only eliminates time to think or associate, but can enrich the leaders.
  • Giving Everything It is very common for a new member to be expected to turn over all assets to the group.
  • Constant Recruitment Often pressure is put on members to bring in new members. Members may be assigned to recruitment duties. This is strong evidence that the main goal of the group is to perpetuate itself and become more powerful.
  • Sexual Mystifying Since normal sexual prerogatives, choices, and experiences are disrupted, along with the blurring of boundaries, members are unable to recognize abuse. This together with blind obedience makes sexual exploitation both common and yet not recognized for what it is.

Benefits Real and Illusory

  • A Place in the World. One never need ‘find’ his or her place because in fact that type of autonomy is not allowed! There is often a false egalitarianism which disguises competition.
  • Routinized Interaction This can be a great boon to the socially awkward because interactions are not to be based on feeling and spontaneity but on custom, rule, or ritual (except for the leaders, which will make them seem all the more special)
  • Experience of Cooperation Cooperating with others on a joint project is a very real source of satisfaction, completely apart from what is accomplished. While in mainstream life adults rarely cooperate, in intentional communities cooperation is the norm. Ex-members tend to still cherish memories of cooperative experience.
  • No Major Decisions. Everything is decided for one. There is neither the burden of deciding, or the dullness of no action.
  • Sense of Completion Searching for final understanding of life is probably misguided, but very human, even for the reasonably happy. Since these communities promise the answer for everything, ‘searchers’ may feel relieved.
  • Answers for all Problems. Because the group will not want any critical thinking or internal wrestling with dilemmas, it will assure members that it has the answer to all problems.
  • An Alternative to Family. Families, healthy and unhealthy, function according to attraction, attachment, and liking of members for each other. Abusive communities ignore and minimize just those aspects of relationship. This can seem a great improvement to people who have been deeply hurt in their families, are reluctant to create any family ties, but who do not want to be alone.
  • To Good to be True is ‘Made True’. Many of us look for a perfect world. It doesn’t exist of course. However, in an abusive community, it is made to seem that it does exist, or is about to come true. This is in stark contrast to outside the group. Keeping this unrealistic hope alive distorts the meaning of problems. Even if corruption or falseness is discerned within the group, it is not seen as evidence of the true nature of the community, but rather just a brief misstep toward the soon to be perfect world.

Retention Strategies

  • Suppressing Outside Criticism: Abusive communities, much more so than abusive individuals, tend to use vigorous legal and social power means to attack and neutralize outside critics. The abusive interpersonal practices are denied, putting the burden of proof on the critic, and the issue is shifted to freedom of thought and religion, making the critic appear narrow-minded and bigoted. These efforts are not about vigorously presenting one side, they are actually about squelching criticism.
  • High Demands This is somewhat counter-intuitive. It seems that placing high-demands on people should accelerate their leaving. But many good people associate high demands with a high quality undertaking. Most people want to belong to something of significance. The longer the time spent in a high demand environment, the more a ‘normal’ life of fewer demands may seem immoral, meaningless, selfish or wasteful. Of course high demands will eventually lead to burnout, but an abusive community usually watches for this and transfers the member to a different ‘compartment’ with different demands that hold some illusory promise of significance.
  • Trauma Bonding Suffering at a low but constant level will release endorphins and adrenaline while at the same time the member places the hardships in a ‘heroic’ framework. This produces a sort of ‘high.’ Normal life seems flat after that. If members were treated better they would be better able to leave. Also doing unusual or difficult things together bonds the member strongly to the group.
  • Shunning Any member leaving immediately loses all friendship and connection. Given that non-community friendships and connections were given up when entering the community, this is doubly devastating
  • Guilt Members are frequently reminded of all they have received (which may have been illusory or unasked for) but will not be reminded of all they have already given. Leaving is always framed as a grave betrayal.
  • Horror Stories. A member that wants to leave will be told about extra-natural calamities that befell others who left the protection of the group or the leader. These are fabricated of course but play on the primitive aspects of guilt. (That is, at least unconsciously, most people feel they should be punished if they are disobedient.)
  • Impoverishment Because members use everything in common, and usually give everything to the group, they are usually penniless, homeless, jobless, and reference-less if they leave.
  • Fear Retaliation and character assassination are common towards those who leave.
  • All or None. In order to leave, members are forced to reject everything about the group, because friendly or partial differences are not acknowledged. This means that members are forced to consider time and resources spent in the group a total mistake, rather than a stage of life. This is very painful, and becomes a strong disincentive to leave.

Crisis in Leaving

  • Purposelessness. All purpose previously was through the group. No other purpose was allowed to develop. A member that has left has a hard time developing a purpose in life because the act of forming a conviction of any sort activates trauma of mind control as described above.
  • Depression. Disillusionment, disappointment, isolation, and lack of self-understanding hit hard upon leaving. Previous comforting rituals are not possible. Depression is common.
  • De-Realization Life consists of choices and consequences, albeit imperfectly linked. But in a manipulated environment, choices are few and consequences are not linked naturally. Subsequently, in an unmanipulated environment, choices may not seem real, and objectives may seem a mystery to pursue.
  • Social De-Skilling. Because of the routinized interactions, the social responses that succeeded in the abusive community do not work as well out in the world. Generally social skills refine as people age, but may be quite primitive, regressed, or maladaptive after a long stint in such a community.
  • Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. Although a leaving member may have had no conscious anxiety during most of his or her stay, the duplicitous environment will have steadily affected the body, causing a slow motion ‘fight-or-flight’ response. This is difficult to undo, once entrenched.
  • Lack of Validation. The member that has left will have a mix of positive and critical feelings about the group. No validation can come from inside the group, which has to see itself as all good. But no validation usually comes from outside the group, because outsiders, if they are interested at all in the matter, see the group as all bad.
  • Overwhelming Feeling of Loss If many years and opportunities were lost because of being in the community, great sorrow will be felt. In addition engaging in constructive self-directed activity, because it reminds the ex-member of the previous inability to do so, will bring these feelings to the forefront, perhaps paralyzing them.
  • Loneliness. All in-group relationships are severed by leaving, and all out-of-group relationships were severed in joining. The formation of new relationships is hampered by social de-skilling and post-traumatic stress disorder.

Communal Abuse and Cults.

5 things women hide from their husbands

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After you tie the knot, the “what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine” mentality can begin to shape your life together. However, for most women, there are at least a few things they tend to hide from their guys—even if they’ve got a tight bond. (Because hey, the men hide stuff, too!) We tapped the experts to find out what women commonly stay hush-hush about. Guilty of any of these?

1. Health Concerns
If a woman finds a suspicious mole, a lump in her breast or has an otherwise disconcerting “symptom,” she may often stay mum or downplay her anxieties.

“Women will hide worrisome concerns from their spouse to protect their husband or decrease distress—especially if it feels major,” said psychologist Kristen Carpenter, PhD, Director of Women’s Behavioral Health at Ohio State’s Wexner Medical Center.

But this gut instinct to stay quiet about worries—as if keeping mum about something means that it doesn’t exist—isn’t the best idea.

“You’re closing yourself off to support and not allowing him to see concerns,” she explained.

So resist the urge and don’t bite your tongue. You deserve a shoulder to lean on, and tag-team support is what marriage is all about.

MORE: 10 Ways to Guarantee You Get Up for That A.M. Workout

2. Trouble in the Relationship
Think: Fighting. Passive-aggressiveness. Disagreeing about where to live; if kids are in the future. If a woman can’t seem to work through relationship issues with her spouse privately, she’ll often schedule a therapy session—and attend alone, according to Jodie Voth, MMFT, a therapist in practice in Canada.

“I cannot tell you how often women come to therapy without their husband’s knowledge,” she said. “Their goal? To decide if the relationship is worth saving or not.”

While doing this individually can be effective, Voth said, but in order to maintain that trust with your man, it’s really better if he’s on the couch right next to you.

“Women hide therapy because it feels risky to involve him,” Voth said. “He now has equal opportunity to influence the fate of the relationship. It’s OK to do personal work in a given session, but he deserves a chance to be involved when it relates to him, too.”

3. Sexual Preferences
Carpenter said she regularly has women in her office who complain that they’re sexually unsatisfied.

“Women don’t talk about sex nearly as much, and very seldom does [any sort of formal] sex ed include talk of pleasure,” she said. “People often just fall into their sexual lives.” So if it’s meh? Ladies just “deal.” Don’t deal!

That’s largely in part, perhaps, because wives generally don’t want to tell their guys about between-the-sheets action they don’t like, Carpenter said. “It’s an emotionally-charged topic, and women are afraid they’ll hurt his feelings,” she added, “which is why I always suggest a conversation about sex outside the bedroom, bringing it up slowly, and telling him something you do like along with what you don’t.”

MORE: What’s Your Sex Number?

4. Personal Successes
Believe it or not, women are less inclined to go home and gab about a promotion at work, a big raise or even an improved marathon time.

“They do not share successes enough,” Carpenter said. “They don’t want to feel there is a race between themselves and their spouse, and think discussing their successes interferes with the male provider role.”

But let’s be real. If you wield more power at work, are the more accomplished athlete or bring home more bacon than him, does it really matter? According to Carpenter, some men do feel threatened.

“Many will say, ‘I want a smart woman, an accomplished woman, but not more so than me,’” she explained. “Unfortunately, that exists. The best is answer is to find the right guy—someone who derives their notions of self-worth from a variety of domains, not just the areas where you’re successful, too.” So don’t sabotage your personal successes on a man’s behalf. Ever!

5. Bank Accounts
“Women may keep secret bank accounts for different reasons, but I’ve found this is something they may have been taught by their mothers,” said Detroit-based clinical therapist Tomanika Witherspoon, LMSW. “For some, it’s a golden rule to always have a stash, just in case the relationship does not work.”

This may give women a sense of security—a nest egg egg to fall back. However, if a husband finds out about secret funds, he may think you’re banking on your marriage to fail.

“There may be a sense of betrayal,” Witherspoon added. “The husband may feel that his wife may be hiding larger secrets.”

Finances are loaded concerns in a marriage, so it’s best to weigh possible outcomes before withholding funds from your partner.

So while you probably don’t have to divulge everything—after all, that’s necessary to maintaining your own sense of self—holding on to certain secrets can impact the trust and support system of your marriage. If there’s an opportunity to open up for the sake of a stronger relationship, why not give it a try?

 

5 things women hide from their husbands | Fox News.

We’re a culture obsessed with parenthood, or “parenting,” as we like to call it.  Countless websites, books, and magazines provide advice for parents aspiring to perfection. And paramount on any good parent’s priority list is making sure our kids are safe and healthy.  So we pay extra for organic milk and banish trans fats from our kitchens.  We deliberate over the safest car seats and sign petitions to ban sodas from school cafeterias.  We talk to our kids early and often about the dangers of smoking, drinking and drugs.

But when it comes to the hazards of sex, our approach falls somewhere between passivity and paralysis.  For whatever reasons – concern about imposing fear and shame, embarrassment about being hypocritical, or not believing that kids are capable of self-control – we can’t bring ourselves to just say “don’t!”  We make sure our kids know about condoms and the Pill, and tell them we’re always there if they want to talk.  Which is the equivalent of shutting our eyes, crossing our fingers, and hoping.  Hoping that our kids won’t get pregnant, or get someone else pregnant.  Hoping that they won’t catch that STD that causes infertility or cancer.  Hoping the chemical bonds that they form and then break won’t break their hearts.

Because here’s the rub.  It is an indisputable fact that having sex means taking risks.  We can reduce the risks of unwanted consequences, but we can’t eliminate them.  We wouldn’t tell our kids that it’s okay to smoke — as long as they smoke low tar cigarettes.  Or that drugs are fine — but only in small doses.  But we tell them – by not telling them otherwise – that risking pregnancy, life-threatening diseases, and emotional devastation is okay.

Here are some cold, hard facts to consider.  Every year there are ten million – ten million! – new cases of sexually transmitted diseases among our sons and daughters who are 15 to 24 years old.  As of 2008, one in four teenagers already had an STD, according to the Centers for Disease Control.  The most commonly transmitted STD is HPV, or human papillomavirus.  We now know that certain types of HPV cause cancers of the head and neck.  Think Michael Douglas.  Others cause cervical cancer.  Another “common STD,” according to the CDC, is chlamydia.  In 2013, there were nearly a million cases among 15- to 24-year olds.  If our daughters are among that million, it could mean they’ll never be able to have kids of their own.

When it comes to the hazards of sex, our approach falls somewhere between passivity and paralysis. For whatever reasons – concern about imposing fear and shame, embarrassment about being hypocritical, or not believing that kids are capable of self-control – we can’t bring ourselves to just say “don’t!”

As for getting pregnant, the CDC reports that nearly half of all pregnancies in this country are unintended.  For women 19 and younger that rises to four out of five.  What’s not to understand here?  Sex makes babies!  According to the Guttmacher Institute, at 2008 rates, one in ten women will have an abortion by the time she is 20 years old.  Even if you’re morally neutral on the subject of abortion, the image of your  daughter crying in her college dorm room as she contemplates the possibility of aborting your grandchild can’t be a pretty one.  And even if you believe abortion is the equivalent of getting a tooth pulled, how could you not worry about the possibility of some psychological fallout.

Then there are the emotional consequences of sexual intimacy.  Studies have linked sexual activity with depression in teenage girls.  We now know about oxytocin, a hormone released in the female brain during sexual activity.  Among other things, it promotes feelings of bonding and trust.  Like it or not, sex comes with emotional strings attached.  Dr. Miriam Grossman is a psychiatrist who worked in the campus counseling center at UCLA.  She recounted the devastating effects of casual sex among her patients in her book, Unprotected.  “Almost daily, I prescribe medication to help students, mostly women, cope with loss and heartbreak.”  Are we willing to live with the prospect of our kids suffering from depression?  Depression that was preventable?

As parents we spend our lives trying to protect our kids.  So here’s a radical thought.  How about urging them to wait till they’re married before having sex?  If we really want what’s best and safest and healthiest for our kids, let’s start a sexual revolution.  Hey, it’s been done before.

Marcia Segelstein has covered family issues for over 20 years
as a producer for CBS News and as a columnist. She has written for “First Things,” “World Magazine,” and “Touchstone.”  She is currently a Senior Editor and columnist for “SALVO” magazine. Her columns can be found at www.salvomag.com.

 

The real truth about sex: What we’re not telling our kids | Fox News.

There’s something undeniably intoxicating about giving your guy the kind of pleasure that will have him moaning to the rafters. Still, blow jobs always seem to take infinitely longer than initially anticipated; and unlike regular jobs, blow jobs don’t come with Internet access or free coffee to help you while away the minutes. That doesn’t mean, however, that there aren’t ways to keep your mind occupied while you keep him mesmerized with bliss. Here are seven ways to do just that.

1. Use Your Tongue to Play Word Games
Start by spelling out the first word that comes to your mouth (hopefully it’s not G-A-G), and then see how quickly you can come up with a word that begins with the letter you ended on. By the time he’s D-O-N-E, you will have strengthened your vocabulary and your endurance!

RELATED: Down, Boy! How to Have More Oral Sex

2. Play the Air Harmonica
Embrace your inner folk singer by imagining that you’re throwing down a soulful air harmonica tune. Picture each note as you’re playing it, and for bonus points, see if you can also remember all the lyrics to the song you’re playing. We’d say you should take this act on the road, but that might be kind of awkward for your friends and family.

3. Practice Your Yoga Breathing
If focusing on your breath can keep your mind occupied while you move through sun salutations, it can certainly get you through a few minutes of having a mouthful. Namaste.

4. Challenge Yourself to a One-Person Game of “Would You Rather?”
Playing a game of chicken with your tonsils feels like a stroll through the park when you’re contemplating whether you’d rather only eat fish guts for the rest of your life or have body hair that grew out as dread locks that you could never shave.

RELATED: 11 Must-Know Oral Sex Tips from Real Women

5. Guess Which of His Testicles Is Bigger
A blow job is often an “all hands on deck” situation. Use your hands to see if you can spot the (hopefully) minor differences between his seemingly identical twins. It’s like a carnival game where he wins an orgasm and you both win some well-earned sleep!

RELATED: 22 Men Dish on the Hottest Oral Sex They’ve Ever Received

6. See How Long You Can Go Without Getting a Pubic Hair In Your Mouth
When you begin, start counting, and don’t stop until you feel the familiar sensation of the world’s grossest floss on your teeth. If this happens, start over and continue until he’s made it to the finish line. The lower the number you count to before things get hairy, the more enthusiastic you’ll be when you remind him that it’s time for him to return the favor to you.

6 Things You Can Do to Pass the Time While Giving a Blow Job | Women’s Health Magazine.

When your parents told you about the birds and the bees, we bet they didn’t tell you that a penis up your poop chute could get you preggers.

Well, luckily, that’s because about 999,999 times in a million, it can’t. When Brian Steixner, M.D., a urologist with the Jersey Urology Group in Atlantic City, was in med school, though, he witnessed the “lucky” one in a million.

One night, a young, pregnant woman came into the emergency department complaining of spotting. While it’s relatively common for women to have light spotting during pregnancy, the blood was coming from her rectum. That — not so common.

RELATED: 8 reasons why you can’t poop — and how to fix that

The woman was born with what’s called a cloacal malformation. Meaning: When she was born, she didn’t have a urethra, vagina and anus. She just had one hole, called a cloaca. (FYI, birds have them.) The condition is incredibly rare, occurring in about one in 25,000 female live births, says Steixner (and it only occurs in girls — lucky us). While no one knows what causes it, it’s usually diagnosed at birth and repaired right away so that the baby has a separate urethra, vagina and rectum.

That’s what happened in this woman’s case. However, something went wrong. Either the surgery was botched or in response to the trauma of surgery, her body formed a fistula (an abnormal connection between organs), and her uterus fused to her rectum. So every month when Aunt Flo came to town, she had her period rectally. Meanwhile, her vagina was a dead end leading nowhere.

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Photo: Shutterstock

RELATED: 11 ways to keep your vagina happy and healthy

Crazy, right? During Steixner’s conversation with the woman, he says she mentioned that she exclusively had anal sex prior to getting pregnant. Well then, that would explain it: She got pregnant through anal sex. “It blew my mind,” he says. A few months later, she had a C-section (the doctors didn’t think she should attempt to “poop” out the baby), and the child was healthy, he says.

Steixner says he doesn’t know what happened to the woman after she had the baby. And while the case of a woman getting pregnant through anal sex due to a cloacal malformation is incredibly rare, being born with a cloaca can be incredibly difficult, even if it is repaired at birth.

“Building the walls to separate the three passages [the urethra, vagina and rectum] is delicate work,” he says. “The longer the walls need to be built, the closer surgeons get to the urethral and anal sphincters. Some women suffer from leakage of urine and stool their entire lives. It’s a huge psychological and quality-of-life issue.”

This woman got pregnant from having anal sex | New York Post.

 

The city’s narcotics cops are being told to stop arresting suspects over the age of 40 — a major strategy shift designed to target younger dealers, who are more likely to carry guns and use them, The Post has learned.

Top brass issued a directive that makes it all but impossible for cops to bust older drug suspects, in order to combat a spike in shootings — which are up 7 percent in 2015 compared with the same period last year and 12 percent over the last four weeks, police sources said.

The new policy was laid out in a May 14 memo obtained by The Post that scolded police bosses for busting people outside the 18-40 demographic — and demanded written explanations for arrests of midlife perps.

Division commanders who got that memo immediately ordered the rank and file to stop making collars in that age group and threatened officers with transfers and other discipline if they did not comply, according to multiple police sources.

The memo was signed by Assistant Chief Brian McCarthy, head of the Narcotics Division, who admitted at a meeting last week the directive came from higher up, said a source who was in attendance.

“A previous topic of discussion has been the need to target violent offenders who are 18 to 40 years of age. It has been well established that the individuals in this age demographic are responsible for the majority of violent crime,” McCarthy wrote. But, he added, a review of arrest records made by narcotics cops “revealed a lack of commitment to this effort.”

As a result, commanders will have to file weekly reports to McCarthy listing every arrest of a person over 40, and supervisors in the field will have to immediately notify their captain and get permission to bust any drug suspect that age.

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The memo was signed by Assistant Chief Brian McCarthy

Commanding officers vented about the directive at a Friday meeting with McCarthy at One Police Plaza, according to sources.

“You’re telling us not to lock these people up,” one of the officers said. “However, the people over 40, they could be your burglars, they could be responsible for car break-ins, they could be responsible for robberies.”

McCarthy allegedly responded, “I’m glad you brought that up, but [the bosses] don’t give a s–t.”

A police source said, “This came from above him. It’s amazing, but if you’re over 40, go out and start selling drugs because you get a freebie.”

Narcotics cops have been scolded by their superiors for arresting older dealers, sources said. And a group of cops from The Bronx were even mocked about it at a recent CompStat meeting as they laid out photos of some recent arrests of perps who all appeared to be 40 or older.

“You should have brought those people to Lourdes instead of Central Booking,” an angry chief cracked, referring to the French town with a spring that Catholics believe has healing powers, a law enforcement source said.

A veteran source told The Post that a respected sergeant was threatened by the precinct’s commanding officer, Inspector Charles McEvoy, with a transfer after his team busted four older suspects.

“They were all over 40 years old. They were put through the system and went down to The Tombs. And [the sergeant] was pulled into a room. He was told if he does it again, he and his team will be launched out of Manhattan North. He’s doing what he’s supposed to do. That’s his job,” the source said.

“I’m blindsided by this. I don’t even know what to say. We’re letting criminals go. Crime is going to skyrocket.”

Sources said the rule makes it impossible for undercover cops to do their jobs.

“If the undercovers are out there and they are trying to buy from drug dealers, they have to have a conversation with them and find out how old they are. And if they’re over 40, they have to pass and move on,” the detective said.

NYPD spokesman Stephen Davis said that after “an analysis of the violence, we identified the core group of people committing the violence in certain areas was in the 18- to 35-year range . . . Since a fair amount of the violence is related to drug activity, our narcotics division was told to focus their efforts on those core areas and core groups.”

Davis insisted that cops “were never instructed to disregard crimes being committed by people of a certain age. No one was told that if you see someone committing a crime, and he happens to be 42 years old, that he gets a pass. That’s not the case.”

There have been 438 shooting victims this year compared to last, an 8.7 percent rise. Over the last 28 days, 126 people were shot compared to 101 for the same period in 2014, a 25 percent spike.

There have also been 378 shootings year to date, compared to 353 a year ago, a 7 percent rise. And over the past 28 days, there have been 102 shootings compared to 91 in 2014, a 12 percent rise.

Narcotics cops ordered to stop arresting suspects over 40 | New York Post.

 

Pre-marital sex is more tolerated among youth than it’s ever been but millennials are having less sex than their baby-boomer parents did, a study has revealed.

Better sexual education may play a role, according to the research.

A survey of 33,000 people published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that 58 per cent of those surveyed in 2012 thought premarital sex was acceptable compared to 44 per cent in 2004.

In 1972 just 28 per cent approved of premarital sex and in 1978, 38 per cent of the population held more progressive views.

Study author: 'Although millennials are more tolerant of these behaviors, they’re not taking that is license to sleep around,' said report author Jean Twenge, who also wrote Generation Me

Study author: ‘Although millennials are more tolerant of these behaviors, they’re not taking that is license to sleep around,’ said report author Jean Twenge, who also wrote Generation Me

In 1982, 44 per cent of the population were engaged in per-marital sex and viewed it as an acceptable behavior.

While it may seem that wider acceptance of sexual practices leads to more sex the numbers say otherwise.

Those born in the 1950s and 1960s averaged 11 sex partners as adults while those born in the 1970s only averaged 10, Time reports.

Babies born in the 80s and 90s are averaged eight sexual partners each.

The group that had the least amount of sex were those born around 1924 who had an average of just two partners each.

 

OLATHE, Kan. – A woman convicted of murdering her husband in their Kansas home walked free Wednesday after serving just 9 years for the crime, reports CBS affiliate KCTV.

In 1982, Melinda Raisch’s husband, 25-year-old David Harmon, was bludgeoned to death in their bedroom. At the time, Raisch told police two intruders knocked her out and she woke up later to find her husband dead. Detectives never believed her story.

Even so, Raisch moved to Ohio, married again and started a family.

David and Melinda Harmon
CBS

Olathe detectives reopened the case 20 years later. This time, she changed her story, telling detectives there was just one intruder.

WATCH: 48 Hours: A Knock on the Door

They arrested her and her former boyfriend, Mark Mangelsdorf, a New York marketing executive who, at the time of the murder, was a college student in Olathe, Kansas.

According to the Kansas City Star, Raisch was convicted of first-degree murder, but prosecutors agreed to a deal where she could plead guilty to second-degree murder in exchange for her testimony against Mangelsdorf.

Mangelsdorf pleaded to second-degree murder and in 2006 both were sentenced to 10-20 years, reports the Star.

Raisch, who was freed Wednesday, will be under supervised parole in Ohio for ten more years.

 

Melinda Raisch, Kansas woman who murdered her husband David Harmon in 1982, freed after 9 years in prison – CBS News.

Men like happy, positive women. So don’t complain about the lack of service at a restaurant or how long you had to wait in a line. Show your upbeat personality.

Dont:

Paint your face like a clown, STINK of perfume, have floozy hair, yellow teeth or bad breath, be an alcoholic, have a hairy body, bitchy and whiny attitude, cuss like a sailor, Nag: ever, or ask for more than you give!

via 10 Things Men Find Unattractive – Millennial Lifestyles.

A former high class call girl is suing an ex-boyfriend after he said she was not a prostitute.

Dr Brooke Magnanti who achieved fame as blogger “Belle de Jour,” writing about her experiences as a $500 an hour call girl is taking the legal action in Scotland, reports the Independent.

It may be the first time in legal history a woman has sued for not being called a prostitute.

It is thought the case is against an ex, Owen Morris.

He began a legal action against her in 2013, claiming he did not believe that she was a prostitute when they were together in a relationship.

She in turn has counter sued, claiming her reputation would be damaged by doubt being cast over whether she was a prostitute.

Her blog spawned two best-selling books and a British TV series, “Secret Diary of a Call Girl.”

Magnenti is now a forensic scientist and writer.

She started writing her call girl blog in 2003, funding her life as a doctorate student by working in the sex trade.

American-born, but now a British citizen, Magnanti’s identity was revealed in 2009.

Former call girl sues ex for saying she wasn’t a prostitute – NY Daily News.

 

 

 

 

“The family has requested that members of the media and the public respect its privacy during this extremely difficult time,” a family spokesman said in the statement.

 

Getty had a restraining order against his former flame, and the unidentified woman had been placed under psychiatric care in the past after injuring cops when they responded to the house.

His ex-girlfriendcalled 911 reporting that he was suffering from cardiac arrest, the site said.

Andrew Getty, 47, was found naked from the waist down in the bathroom of his Hollywood Hills home around 2 p.m. with significant bleeding to his rectal area after suffering blunt-force trauma, a police source told the Los Angeles Times.

It’s unclear how the injury was caused.

While the death appeared to be from natural causes,

Blunt force truama to the ass is a natural cause?  Please inform us all what in this natural world will cause us to die from massive bleeding out of our ass.

it was called an accident

because of medication found at the scene, Los Angeles County coroner’s Assistant Chief Ed Winter said.

I guess even a dead “girlfriend” can cause the same problem….

An Argentinian man died during sex with a scarecrow he elaborately dressed up as a woman, reports say.

A kinky Argentinian man croaked while having sex with a scarecrow that he dressed in lipstick and a wig — and strapped a sex toy on, according to reports.

Jose Alberto, 58, was found dead in his San Jose de Balcare home, lying next to the straw doll, the Irish Mirror reported.

“There were no signs of violence, and we are working on the assumption that the man died during sex with the scarecrow,” police spokesman Rodolfo Moure told the publication.

The depraved sex fiend, who tended to sheep, had puffed up the scarecrow with clothes and tied a 6-inch strap-on penis to it, reports said.

His rotting remains were found after neighbors complained to police of a foul stench coming from his home, where he lived alone.

Autopsy results have not yet been released.

mchan@nydailynews.com

At least some women know when to get out….

A Nigerian woman is seeking to annul her recent marriage after finding her husband’s penis to be ‘too big.’

A Nigerian man’s huge penis proved to be a deal breaker for his new bride who described sex with him as “a nightmare.”

The woman’s request for an annulment to her one-week-old marriage sparked laughter in a Zamfara courtroom once she explained her shocking reason, Nigeria’s Tribune reported.

But Aisha Dannupawa, a previously married mother of three, said the matter was anything but funny.

“When he came (over), we had sex but the experience was a nightmare,” she said of her sexual relations with Ali Maizinari. “Instead of enjoying the sex, it turned out to be something else, because his penis was too big.”

Dannupawa said her mother gave her medication after their first painful attempt at intimacy. But the second time they tried to have intercourse she resolved to never do it again.

When he came (over), we had sex but the experience was a nightmare.

Her husband, who did not deny his girth, told the court that he’d be willing to dissolve their marriage if she returned the dowry he had paid, as well as the money spent courting her.

He estimated he paid 60,000 Nigerian Naira or about $300.

The court asked the couple to try to reconcile one last time before their next appearance.

Oil fortune heir Andrew Getty dies of rectal injury in L.A. – NY Daily News.

Screen Shot 2015-01-21 at 1.17.23 PM

This is too awesome!

So this girl was looking for a rich husband on a dating website. Her biography was very straight forward about her seeking a rich husband. In a quick summary, she is just a complete gold digger. But the email she received from the J.P. Morgan CEO was definitely not what she expected!

Girls Biography:

“I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.

My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?

Among those I’ve dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit.
If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:

1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who don’t have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty”

Reply from J.P. Morgan CEO:

“Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here.
From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money” : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year.

Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”.
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”.

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps.

signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO”

#FUCKINGOWNED

via Girl Seeking A Rich Husband Did Not Expect This Reply! | CE.

Man is sent to jail woman gets a ticket……

Sex in broad daylight: Shoppers get an eye full – 23ABC News.

If it was a male teacher and a female student it would have been 7 years!

Judge Gives Teacher Who Had Sex With Student 30 Days, Calls Her ‘Dangling Candy’.

Forbidden Bookshelf | Feed Your Need To Read.

These Powerful #FreeTheNipple Photos Challenge the Way We Sexualize Women’s Breasts.

Sabrina Rubin Erdely, the author of a now-discredited article in Rolling Stone magazine about a rape at a University of Virginia fraternity, issued this statement:

“The past few months, since my Rolling Stone article “A Rape on Campus” was first called into question, have been among the most painful of my life. Reading the Columbia account of the mistakes and misjudgments in my reporting was a brutal and humbling experience. I want to offer my deepest apologies: to Rolling Stone’s readers, to my Rolling Stone editors and colleagues,to theU.V.A. community, and to any victims of sexual assault who may feel fearful as a result of my article.

“Over my 20 years of working as an investigative journalist — including at Rolling Stone, a magazine I grew up loving and am honored to work for — I have often dealt with sensitive topics and sources. In writing each of these stories I must weigh my compassion against my journalistic duty to find the truth. However, in the case of Jackie and her account of her traumatic rape, I did not go far enough to verify her story. I allowed my concern for Jackie’s well-being, my fear of re-traumatizing her, and my confidence in her credibility to take the place of more questioning and more facts. These are mistakes I will not make again.

“Reporting on rape has unique challenges, but the journalist still has the responsibility to get it right. I hope that my mistakes in reporting this story do not silence the voices of victims that need to be heard.”

Statement From University of Virginia President

Teresa A. Sullivan, the president of the University of Virginia, in Charlottesville, issued a statement late Sunday.

“Rolling Stone’s story, ‘A Rape on Campus,’ did nothing to combat sexual violence, and it damaged serious efforts to address the issue. Irresponsible journalism unjustly damaged the reputations of many innocent individuals and the University of Virginia. Rolling Stone falsely accused some University of Virginia students of heinous, criminal acts, and falsely depicted others as indifferent to the suffering of their classmate. The story portrayed university staff members as manipulative and callous toward victims of sexual assault. Such false depictions reinforce the reluctance sexual assault victims already feel about reporting their experience, lest they be doubted or ignored.

“The Charlottesville Police Department investigation confirms that far from being callous, our staff members are diligent and devoted in supporting and caring for students. I offer our community’s genuine gratitude for their devotion and perseverance in their service.

“Sexual violence is a serious issue for our society, and it requires the focus and attention of all in our communities. Long before Rolling Stone published its article, the University of Virginia was working to confront sexual violence. And we will continue to implement substantive reforms to improve culture, prevent violence and respond to acts of violence when they occur. Our highest priority is to ensure the safety of our students so they can learn and achieve their personal potential in an environment of trust and security. We will continue to work tirelessly in pursuit of that goal.”

 

Statement From Writer of Rolling Stone Rape Article, Sabrina Erdely – NYTimes.com.